MG fantasy - Does this work?

[ChokeCherry]

Hi, I'm working on my next WIP and have been hammering over this beginning for weeks - but I'm not sure it works.
I'd really appreciate any comments (even bad ones  )  Thanks!

       If Meg could choose any place in the world to be, she most likely would have picked the library. Most of the time you could find her with her nose stuck between the pages of a fantastical story about dragons, heroic knights and magic – lots of magic. Or maybe, just maybe, she would have chosen to be sitting in a corner booth at the Italian restaurant on Third Street in the small town of Morrill, Nebraska. The restaurant served a mountain of spaghetti with fresh baked bread, and, most importantly, a maraschino cherry in the lemon soda. But whatever place Meg would have chosen to be, it most definitely, to a thousand million billion percent certainty, wouldn’t have been Nana’s living room.

[Kimmy]

It's very descriptive, but it sounds like all backstory. Maybe reverse it, because it sounds like Nana's living room is not the place to be, so start with:

If Meg could choose any place in the world to be, it most definitely, to a thousand million billion percent certainty, wouldn’t have been Nana’s living room.

That grabs my interest right away because why doesn't she want to be there? Hope this helps!

[ChokeCherry]

hmmm... okay. I see what you're saying. Thanks!

[LateToTheParty]

It's very descriptive, but it sounds like all backstory. Maybe reverse it, because it sounds like Nana's living room is not the place to be, so start with:

If Meg could choose any place in the world to be, it most definitely, to a thousand million billion percent certainty, wouldn’t have been Nana’s living room.

That grabs my interest right away because why doesn't she want to be there? Hope this helps!

The conflict is 

[Careyrox]

Yep. Agree totally.

[ChokeCherry]

Simple and direct is often better - sometimes the writer in me wants to get break loose 
So, I've cut everything down to

If Meg could choose any place in the world to be, she most definitely, to a thousand million billion percent certainty, wouldn’t have chosen Nana’s living room.

and then just go on to the next paragraph, which describes how 'strict' and 'unfriendly' the room - and mostly Nana - is.

Thanks everyone!

[Kimmy]

  Kudos to you for doing a great job! Of course, you don't have to take people's advice all the time, but I have learned that when a few people agree on a comment, its worth the change and always improves things. Good luck!