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QueryTracker Community
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Queries and Agents
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World's Worst Query Letters
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Genre Confusion
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Topic: Genre Confusion (Read 2552 times)
Waterfall
Sr. Member
Karma: 29
Offline
Posts: 104
Genre Confusion
«
on:
June 26, 2018, 05:41:16 PM »
I have a book.
I certainly do.
I like my story
and you'll like it, too.
The words are all small
and easy to say.
So even a grown-up
can come in and play.
The story's exciting
and full of surprise.
With murders and stabbings
and multiple wives.
There's stalking and drinking
and snakes on a plane.
The werewolves are bloody,
the zombies eat brains.
A Mafia don
and a vampire, too,
they contract a hit man
to kill the whole crew.
It's a fabulous book
filled with violence and gore.
You'll read it and read it
and go back for more.
There's hookers and junkies.
Drug runners and snipers.
There's CIA monkeys
And KGB vipers.
So hey, madame agent,
so what do you say
to a picture-book story
done HBO-way?
I think it's a winner.
I think it's a hit.
You make me my millions,
I'll give you your split.
Put down your coffee
and put down your scone.
Just sharpen your pencil
and pick up the phone.
Sincerely,
Dr. Quentin Tarantino Seuss
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Munley
Hero Member
Karma: 94
Offline
Posts: 346
Mr. Fluff -- from the SPCA
Re: Genre Confusion
«
Reply #1 on:
June 26, 2018, 07:51:47 PM »
Deer Doctor S:
Read your manuscript?
Not
without you
hiring
my son-in-law the Book Doctor first!
That's where I get MY cut.
Stalking, stabbing, blood-sucking what-nots. The nerve!
Agent Aura
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NextChapter
Sr. Member
Karma: 28
Offline
Posts: 127
Re: Genre Confusion
«
Reply #2 on:
June 27, 2018, 07:02:50 AM »
Picture books keep getting weirder and weirder.
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Tigerlily1066
Full Member
Karma: 24
Offline
Posts: 95
Re: Genre Confusion
«
Reply #3 on:
June 28, 2018, 07:43:38 AM »
I LOLed. Very funny, Waterfall! (Also, I totally want to read this picture book now.)
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RockWhitehouse
Full Member
Karma: 6
Offline
Posts: 50
Re: Genre Confusion
«
Reply #4 on:
June 29, 2018, 11:00:31 PM »
I printed this out and read it to Mrs. Rock.
It was THAT GOOD!
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Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work. - Edison
maryj59
Sr. Member
Karma: 28
Offline
Posts: 171
Re: Genre Confusion
«
Reply #5 on:
July 17, 2018, 01:22:20 PM »
Actually, I think a letter like that might get some nibbles! It's awesome! I wonder what the query shark would make of it.
Kudos.
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Pineapplejuice
Hero Member
Karma: 88
Offline
Posts: 418
Re: Genre Confusion
«
Reply #6 on:
August 22, 2018, 11:08:08 AM »
This made me giggle and smile
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