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Author Topic: Opening paragraph for Eight-sided Mountain  (Read 777 times)

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« on: April 04, 2019, 07:01:41 PM »

Here is the opening for my historical novel set in 1930-40s, China. Please let me know how I can make it stronger. Thanks for all your suggestions!

“Damn the dwarf bandits!”

Mei looked up in surprise at her father’s words. Her half-peeled breakfast egg slipped from her hands onto the plate. She had never heard him curse before. Face flushed, he threw the newspaper he was reading on the table, took off his grey jacket, and flung it on the chair. He slammed his fist on the table. “Heaven, pray strike these monsters with your thunderbolts and send them straight to hell, right now. Before they murder more people!”
« Last Edit: April 24, 2019, 05:14:15 PM by pamelalpan » Logged
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