Revised Synopsis, and title suggestions please

[Kimmy]

In light of the agent blog I read this morning stating that a great title will make her request more material, I wondered if anyone has any suggestions for my title.  And, here is my revised synopsis again, so please comment!  I want it ready soon so I can start querying!  Thanks to all!

TRIAL #2: PAST LIVES

When ELIZABETH GRAYSON meets newcomer CHRIS EDWARDS on the first day of her senior year of high school, she believes she has found her soul mate. For seventeen-year-old Liz, it's almost as if her life is complete when she and Chris fall in love, sharing the feeling that they are connected on a deeper level.

But when perfect-in-every-way MINA MANSON moves to town, she immediately sets her sights on Chris. Liz doesn't appreciate Mina's disregard for her, nor the blatant flirting with her boyfriend. But Chris is blind to Mina's intentions and his loyalty lies with Liz.

Liz makes an appointment with the new guidance counselor, JEWELS, to discuss her relationship with Chris and Mina's interference.  They talk about the existence of soul mates and the possibility that Liz, Chris, and Mina may have known each other in another life, prompting Liz to do some research online.

Through the research, Liz comes across old newspaper articles with photos of  people who closely resemble her, Chris and Mina.  She's convinced the three of them knew each other in those lives, and based on the articles, the consequences were deadly.  Realizing the threat that Mina presents to them from their past history, Liz confides her fears to Chris.  But Chris is too logical to believe in reincarnation.  What he does believe in is Liz’s jealousy.

Mina  tries to convince Chris that Liz is going crazy, pursuing him to her own ends.  What Mina doesn’t tell Chris is that she’s done her own homework and knows even more about their past than Liz   She successfully convinces him that Liz needs space and manipulates him into breaking up with her.  Mina takes advantage of the situation and tries to worm her way into Chris's heart. 

Shortly after, all three end up at the same Halloween party. While in costume, Liz is able to get close enough to Mina to record her having a conversation  where she admits to everything Liz has suspected about the past.  The conversation is presented to an incredulous Chris in front of Mina.  Mina denies everything despite the proof of her own words.  Chris finally sees through her lies and asks Liz to forgive him.  Now aware of the truth, Chris and Liz go to leave the party together when Mina grabs Liz by the hair, telling her that this isn't over yet.

After the party, Mina gets taken out of school, Liz gets her soulmate back, and Chris accepts their unusual shared history.  Chris presents Liz with a beautiful Christmas gift that represents their eternal love -- a past, present, and future ring.
 

[tm9410]

Nice work! I really like this version. It is a nice, smooth flow. It succintly explains anything that could be potentially confusing and leaves out the rest. I particularly like the addition of the line about Mina doing her homework and knowing more about their past than Liz.

I think you have done a great job presenting your story.

As far as title goes - that's a tough one. Do you have any ideas we can pick from?

Tamara

[Kimmy]

Thank you tamara!  YAY not only for me but for all of you who gave me great advice!  And that line you like was written by Ernest Clark!  Thanks Ernest!    Well, Ive had many title ideas, I tried to find something that sounded cool but went with the karma idea:

past, present, future;  shared past;   Past Lives;    Unwritten Future
Round 3/Phase 3/Third Chance; cosmic karma, constant karma, consecutive karma, karma key, karmic keys, karmic keeper, karmic keepsake, karmic kick, karmic kickback, karmic kicker, karmic killjoy, karmic kin, karmic kinks, karmic kinship, karmic kraft,

[Magic_Seeker]

  I agree with Tamara, this version is smooth! 

I have some suggestions for a title: 

Ring around the Past
Soul Mate Spiral
Jealous Lies

Let us know what you choose!   

[tm9410]

Hi, Kimmy,

I've been thinking about your title suggestions - just riffing off a few of them, how about Karmic Killer, Karma Killer, or Deadly Karma? Not very romantic,  though.

I thought Magic Seeker's Ring Around the Past was interesting too because it plays off the ring he gives her in the end.

Titles are hard. Come to think of it, it's all hard! Let us know what you choose....

Tamara

[Zooks]

Hi Kimmy,

Well done!     Much tighter and you've also given more info.  How about Triple Threat?

[Kimmy]

Thanks everyone!  Karma to all for helping me sooooo much - I'll remember you when I'm famous! hahaha

[JHarris]

Hi Kimmy

How about "Deja woo"? I like the synopsis.

[Kimmy]

That is really cool!  Deja Woo!  Karma to you for a cool idea!!!