Hahahahaha--I really needed the laughs today, after spending all day revising and re-revising both my query letter and synopsis. Here's my small contribution!
Iím in desperate need of an agent and you look like youíre struggling based on the fact that I havenít heard of one of the authors you represent. Iím thinking we might be able to help each other out, right? My book is guaranteed to be a best selleróand most of my friends even think that it should even be a movieóso perhaps you can work on a multi-media deal for me, okay?
Iím happy to send you my bookówell what I have finished of it anyway. Iíll only say that it is a memoir of my incredible life. Iím not going to say more because you really need to read the book but you wonít be sorry if you do (have I got your interest now???).
Iím so sure that my book is going to make me famous that I just quit my jobóso obviously, Iím going to need a lot of money as an advance--be sure to make sure publishers know this in advance.
Iím expecting you are interested already, so I am attaching the entire manuscript for your convenience.
Hereís to our new partnership, bud! As Bogie said, ďThis is the start to a beautiful relationship.Ē I just feel it in my bones!
Get back to me soon or you might lose out!
You just got lucky, agent!