When a bad query gets representation....

[MarvaD]

One of our members just got signed.  HURRAH! 

But her query contained punctuation and even spelling errors. 

I'm SO happy for her,    and yet it only causes me to wonder more than ever, what the heck are agents looking for?

WTF! I certainly have mixed feelings about this. Everybody in this forum is working than ass off to make their queries perfect. So much for all that effort.

This is the kind of thing that reinforces my decision to not bother with agents anymore.

[Aiala]

But then you can see that the literary agents, and their interns, are doing what *we* do here.

Hmm... not so sure about that. Yes, *we* do selectively cull the queries, excerpts, synopses etcetera which appeal to us, but it's based upon personal --even, on occasion, literary-- tastes.

Agents, on the other hand, are in it for the money. Which is to be expected; it's their livlihood. But you'd be hard-pressed to unearth any agent out there who would pass up fifteen percent of a guaranteed Harry Potter-style mega-seller simply because it's atrociously written. They cannot afford to have taste. Taste isn't bankable.   

~A~

[gypsygurl]

Clearly her story and plot were intriguing enough that the small errors were overlooked for the overall picture.  Point of fact, my query had a spelling error in it.  I went over that thing so many times... still, it was there. I also swore three times.  I also didn't attach pages.  I also screwed up one of the submission guidelines. I worked my ass off on querying and took crazy amounts of notes on who wanted what with which submission and I still messed up. Accidents happen.  Not to mention the fact that I added over a hundred pages to the start of the novel in a round of edits, so I was signed on the back 3/4 ths of the book technically.

But she liked the query.
And then she loved the manuscript, even with its flaws, and she thought she could sell it, which she did.

I think it's extremely rude to throw someone's success story out there as an excuse to launch into yet another What do they want from us? Sad Panda Dance Party. Agents want a good story (and yes, that "good story" is HIGHLY subjective), also something they think they can sell, because that is not only their job, but also why you are SIGNING with them. So they can sell your story--a story they envision a market for, and possibly envision a specific house or editor.  I don't understand writers who complain that agents only take on things they think they can sell. Why the hell would you sign with an agent who was like "Well, Client, I mean, no one's going to buy it, but I guess we'll throw it out there and waste some time." 

Yes, querying sometimes sucks.  Yes, there are times you will cry and give up and scream to the gods that it is not fair, but here's the thing.  This board is about QUERIES. If you are writing one, you are trying to get an agent, enough said.  If you hate the publishing industry and the agents and their advice and the way things are done and the contracts and all the other little things that pop up in the Sad Panda Dance Party (tm)  (sorry, that's catchy...I'm claiming it :P ) then self publish and you won't have to deal with any of it.  We have some self publishers on the board, some who've had some success too!  They're very happy with their choice and I've seen them be very open and honest and helpful to others who are looking into self publishing. 


My point is this... It is one thing to have a bad day, and need some hugs and support.  It is quite another to preach about how agents are stupid and unprofessional and worthless wastes of time when your whole purpose in being on this board is to sign with one of these agents you loathe so much.  Maybe traditional publishing's not for you. If you don't like everything associated with it to the point where you are throwing your fellow writers onto the boards to be made a mockery of, maybe it's time you considered other options that might have you smiling at the end of the day.  Perhaps, self publishing.  Perhaps some other career.  Remember, this is supposed to be something you LOVE!  If you're not happy, what's the point? 

[dana]

gypsygurl, it amazes me how we (of course) check our queries for mis-spellings, making sure we've done everything correctly....AND THE MOMENT WE HIT "SEND" all errors become glaringly obvious!!

Thanks to the Quick Query on QT, it's becoming easier to correct the same mistake before we send it again. 

(I've even forgotten to include my name!)

[Chandara]

gypsygurl, it amazes me how we (of course) check our queries for mis-spellings, making sure we've done everything correctly....AND THE MOMENT WE HIT "SEND" all errors become glaringly obvious!!

Thanks to the Quick Query on QT, it's becoming easier to correct the same mistake before we send it again. 

(I've even forgotten to include my name!)

LOL..Guilty as charged. 

[Zooks]

So well put, gypsygurl.    karma to you.

[gypsyjules]

I think gypsygurl makes a valid point.  Taste is subjective, for agents and readers alike.  You may not like someone's genre, you may think that books about vampires and werewolves and the supernatural are silly. You can prefer Hemingway to mass market authors and think that makes you more cultured or educated, and if you feel pain in your chest and curse commercialism every time you hear a Beatles song hawking tennis shoes or beer or computers--that's completely understandable.

But under no circumstance do I think you should begrudge a fellow writer their success, even if it came with misspellings or in a forum that you don't particularly enjoy.  Those misspellings may be yours one day.  Okay, maybe you can begrudge Snooki a little.

[SAR11577]

I SO begrudge Snooki. And maybe Lauren Conrad, just a little, but she's got better hair so I forgive her.

Everyone else...we're just one big happy family chasing that great big book deal in the sky.
 

[dana]

Who is Snooki?

[Locke]

+1 Karma for not knowing who Snooki is. I envy you.

Snooki is a person who is prominently featured in the reality show "Jersey Shore." Being a reality show, it naturally has as little to do with reality as possible. As I am not an avid viewer, I can't really tell you more details than that. Jersey Shore gained interest when it portrayed a woman (it might have been Snooki, I'm not sure) hitting her date repeatedly at a club. If you want to learn more, I suppose you could watch the show.

But, I wouldn't do that.

Snooki has earned some spotlight by using her relative fame from the show in order to launch a book deal. She must have a brilliant publicist, too, because many credible pieces of literature were ousted from their usual avenues of publicity so that those media outlets could feature Snooki instead. Many critics have lambasted her for an obvious ploy to garner more attention for herself, which she defended by saying that she's credible as an author since she's read at least three books (paraphrased).

Warning: biased opinion follows.

I don't think she's worth anybody's time. The book promptly dropped out of the spotlight the moment it was published. It's a prime example of how big names use their public notoriety to get publication deals regardless of their literary merit. I think she's approximately eighty-five percent as intelligent as her nickname suggests.

[Aiala]

Isn't she the brain-dead counterpart to the equally brain-dead Situation?   

~A~

[dana]

Thank you Locke.  I believe she's the short girl with the big rear end and long fingernails that I've been seeing on a pistachio commercial.  Well, no WONDER she got a book published.

[JRo]

First off, well said gypsygurl and and gypsyjules. Karma to both of you.

Secondly.... WHOA! Hold up a second. Another QT member got an agent and/or pub offer? That is freakin awesome. That is all this post should even be about. Congratulating someone who has worked their ass off to get representation. Why are we even questioning their error of their query? None of us are query experts. (Except maybe Elana. She wrote a book about them  )

Man, I can tell you, if that was my query and someone was asking how I got representation, I'd be pretty downright hurt. To be honest with you. This is such a subjective business, a COLD and sometimes LONELY business. Each rejection is like a slap in the face. Each partial is like the best high out there. Each full is like winning the lottery. And each rejection on them takes a bit of your confidence. And all it takes is one yes, one phone call, one person to believe in you to turn that all around. Right? Right? No. The community of WRITERS is what keeps a lot of us still plowing a long. Without everyone here, coaching me and hoping for me to "make it" I would have given up a long time ago.

We've got to support each other. And blasting someone's query is so counterproductive to keeping people motivated. And maybe that's not what you've intended, but that's how it's coming across.

And just like gypsygurl- I had errors in MS. Past tense perfect issues and God knows what else. It happens. None of us are perfect.

I fee like I need to say something that I learned in first grade. "If you don't have anything nice to say, then please just don't say anything." That goes toward members of QT, aspiring writers, lurkers, and agents. Okay, everyone can talk bad about Snooki. That is an exception.

[dana]

As I was fearing, the "agent" turned out to be less than an "agent" and it turned into one of those "and for a few dollars more we can put a cover on your book!"

And another querier came crashing down.

It was one of her first queries and I had a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.  I just got ULTRA spooked over it.  That's why I was trying to "feel things out" on here, asking WHY an agent would hop so fast on a query in its formative stages, including lots of spelling errors. 

Then I was told on this thread of all the reasons it could happen, and I breathed a sigh of relief.

I was trying to do it without being too explicit because I didn't want her to make any connections between my questions and her query.  She was happy.  I was SO relieved.  And then...

[MaryL]

And your dog is amazingly cute!