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Queries and Agents => Post your Elevator Pitch => Topic started by: avesthom on October 10, 2016, 03:09:37 PM

Title: I am Remarkable
Post by: avesthom on October 10, 2016, 03:09:37 PM
After being diagnosed with schizophrenia, Jack Sheer, an eighteen-year-student, thinks it’s just a matter of time before Divine Madness takes him for once and all. But few unexpected and meaningful relationships change the direction of his life.

Title: Re: I am Remarkable
Post by: mayachhabra on October 10, 2016, 03:17:20 PM
This is not bad. One thing that could improve it is being more specific about what relationships those are.

Also, Divine Madness being your own term, maybe "before he goes catatonic" or something easier for other people to understand.

Title: Re: I am Remarkable
Post by: kwill79 on November 29, 2017, 10:45:10 AM
This is really good and instantly grabbed me...definitely a book I would want to know more about!  I don't have a problem with the term 'Divine Madness' because for some reason it seems to make sense that each person would have their own special name for their personal demons. 

Is it supposed to say 'a few meaningful relationships' instead of 'few meaningful relationships'?  That part confused me a bit, but is probably just a typo ; )

Overall, I think it's great and while it would be nice, as mayachabra mentioned, to clarify what those 'meaningful relationships' are, you probably wouldn't be able to elaborate much if you are trying to keep it extremely concise.  If you can add any specifics though (love, friendship, family), that would probably make it a little more engaging.  Good luck!