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What's Left? => Anything Goes => Topic started by: Noctleigh on December 27, 2008, 03:18:46 PM

Title: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on December 27, 2008, 03:18:46 PM
The Rules

I will start by asking a question. The next person posts two things: an answer to my question, then a question of their own. The person after that responds to that persons question, and so on and so forth. It's helped cure writers block as well as promote procrastination. So here we go!

Q: Where does rain come from?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: newday11 on December 27, 2008, 04:50:45 PM
 :draw:
A. God.
Q. Who is God?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on December 27, 2008, 06:13:21 PM
A.  The creator of real aloe vera, among other things.  Duh. ;D
Q.  Why do toenails grow?
(I hate those brochures about various things that say there's no such thing as a stupid question.  Seriously, what were they thinking???)
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on December 27, 2008, 08:18:45 PM
A: Our bodies exert so much pressure on our feet, waste is pushed out of the ends of our toes, thus toenails.

Q: If you give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day, but what if you give a man a laundry hamper?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Cole Gibsen on December 27, 2008, 08:57:55 PM
A: He'll still continue to throw his socks on the floor. (A mere two feet from the hamper)

Q: Why do cats purr?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: M.Hall on December 27, 2008, 10:34:47 PM
beacuse the little squirl inside their heads has to run extra fast to think of what the cat will make you do next..

Q) How long is forever?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: MaryL on December 27, 2008, 10:48:45 PM
Question: Are we there yet?

Answer:  NO! 

 

Question:  Do fish drink water?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on December 27, 2008, 10:54:55 PM
A: Only if it's a dry wedding.

Q: Where was Santa Claus when baby Jesus was born?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: ChristineF on December 28, 2008, 02:30:06 AM
A: - Contemplating his role on Earth...

Q:  What color is the sky ...really?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on December 28, 2008, 07:13:10 PM
A:  The sky, opposed to the popular belief of blue or black, is completely purple… and green.

Q:  What are crayons made of?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: MarvaD on December 28, 2008, 07:59:46 PM
A:  The sky, opposed to the popular belief of blue or black, is completely purple… and green.

Q:  What are crayons made of?
A: Kid snot and horse hooves.  Sometimes we call that wax.

Q: How does a moon dog appear?

Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on December 28, 2008, 10:30:44 PM
A: By leaving a hot dog on your windowsill overnight.

Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on December 28, 2008, 10:33:02 PM
A:  Both.

Q:  What does it mean when a raven flies over your head one minute after noon while you are sipping a lemonade slushie and trudging through a meadow full of daisies?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: M.Hall on December 29, 2008, 12:29:27 AM
A) Don't Sneeze

Q) Is there only one reality?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on December 29, 2008, 12:40:43 AM
A:  Recreational sports.

Q:  Isn’t it a pleasure to have an old friend visit from afar? [Kongfuzi/Confucius]
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on December 29, 2008, 11:07:05 PM
A: Only when their kids don't trash the place.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on January 01, 2009, 03:27:52 PM
A:  To escape the undead Turkish delight.

Q:  Is plastic a part of a conspiracy that's plotting to take over the world? ;D
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 01, 2009, 06:37:36 PM
Jefferson (I think.)

Question:  A man goes out on a horse on Thursday and returns on Thursday but is gone only three days, how is this possible?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on January 01, 2009, 06:58:27 PM
A: The horse's name is Thursday! (I've actually heard that one. ;D)

Q: If a hyperbola crosses the x-axis at (5,0), where is its other x-intercept? (Oh yeah, go Pre-Cal... :no:)
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on January 02, 2009, 05:16:32 AM
A:  Half-way to nowhere.

Q:  Where is the location of Qwertyuiop-asdfghjkl-zxcvbnm?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 02, 2009, 09:02:19 AM
A: In the annexed, free-state of Munchkinland. That's where Sir Brr, the cowardly lion, ran into Elphie, told her that her son would be seduced by the power of Emerald City, and that she should get over her daddy issues. This all happened before she set him on fire, of course.

A: Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: AshK on January 02, 2009, 05:09:30 PM
A: In the annexed, free-state of Munchkinland. That's where Sir Brr, the cowardly lion, ran into Elphie, told her that her son would be seduced by the power of Emerald City, and that she should get over her daddy issues. This all happened before she set him on fire, of course.

A: Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
A: Because Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid.

Q: What is the difference between an orange?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on January 03, 2009, 09:20:11 PM
A: Of course not.  If there was, what would we write about?

Q: Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on January 03, 2009, 09:30:53 PM
A: He makes a razor out of a seashell and gets up before the rest of the cast and crew to maintain the myth that he simply cannot grow facial hair.  :eek:

Q: Why don't dead men wear plaid?  :naughty:
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 03, 2009, 09:38:02 PM
A: they'd be mistaken for golfers.

Q: Why does only one sock come out of the dryer when I know I put two in?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on January 03, 2009, 09:59:46 PM
A: An ancient, nomadic dryer civilization, known only as Them, hunt socks during each cycle, then take the largest kills with them when they move on to another dryer.  And the hunt begins again.

Q: Is the fact that there are 23 synonyms for the color red and 23 flavors in a Dr. Pepper the reason for the coloring of the aforementioned soda's can?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 03, 2009, 10:06:21 PM
A: No, Originally the soda was created as a stomach remedy similar to Pepto Bismal.  Back then, printing colors were limited.  The color red, it's number of synonyms and ingredients is purely coincidental. (I heard this question while I was in medical school.)

Q: What did the snail say when he jumped on the turtle's back? 
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on January 03, 2009, 10:09:45 PM
A: Nothing.  Snails don't talk.

Q: Why are the male bettas the pretty ones?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: wert on January 03, 2009, 10:23:36 PM
A. because female betta's chase pretty things.
Q. Why do men's feet stink?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: ChristineF on January 04, 2009, 04:26:45 PM
A.  It's all the S--- they step in regularly. (what - I was going to say "stuff"!)
Q.  What makes football so popular?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 04, 2009, 05:12:02 PM
A: The competition for alpha males, and the butt patting for the rest of us.  ;D

Q: What is really at the end of a rainbow?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 04, 2009, 06:01:23 PM
A: Skittles!

Q:  What is the difference between a buffalo and a bison?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: ChristineF on January 04, 2009, 06:12:37 PM
a.  2 letters
q.  Why does "no" seldom mean "no"?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 04, 2009, 06:18:58 PM
A: Because whoever is saying it has "yes" in their eyes.

Q: Why am I posting when I should be working in the kitchen? ;D
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: wert on January 04, 2009, 07:01:53 PM
A. Because its crazy kookie fun!
Q. Why would you want to work in the kitchen?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 05, 2009, 09:05:26 AM
A: There's food there. There is no better reason to be there.

Q: If I pushed that red button, what would happen?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on January 05, 2009, 12:54:19 PM
A:  You would win a million dollars.  Then the world would self-destruct.

Q:  What did Chuck Norris say to the tortoise after he won the race?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on January 05, 2009, 03:24:07 PM
A: Go team.

B: How can pink ever be the new black, or vice versa?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 05, 2009, 03:36:14 PM
A: If it's worn in the dark, they look identical.

Q: Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near? ;D

(sorry, I couldn't resist ... my neighbor is having a Carpenters marathon)

Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on January 05, 2009, 04:32:22 PM
A: Alfred Hitchcock.

Q: If I mix frog's wort, devil's tounge, and cat's toes with a pinch of salt, what do I get?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on January 05, 2009, 09:10:50 PM
A: Frog's wort, devil's tongue, and cat's toes paste, with a pinch of salt.

Q: What do you get when you cross a llama with another llama? ;D
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: wert on January 05, 2009, 09:51:21 PM
A. Intersecting llama's or two old men on a mountain, wearing thongs, and duking it out.
Q. why does cardboard smell like cheerios?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 06, 2009, 12:16:32 AM
A: They wash the cardboard with cheerios. Otherwise it'd smell like burnt rubber, and we don't want that.

Q: What do women mean when they say "I don't care. Anywhere is fine"?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 06, 2009, 05:01:13 AM
A: Well, they've gotta tell the movers something before they drop the box of china.

Q: Why do old men climb mountains wearing thongs to fight?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: AshK on January 06, 2009, 06:14:29 AM
A. To keep the goats from nipping at their pantlegs.

Q. How big, exactly, is the market for a line of male warrior thongs?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: wert on January 06, 2009, 07:37:47 AM
A. Its itsy bitsy teeny weeny.
Q. What is the price of everything?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on January 06, 2009, 03:15:26 PM
A:  Nothing.

Q:  Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 06, 2009, 05:37:54 PM
A: next door?

B: Why does time fly so fast when you're having coffee?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on January 06, 2009, 06:46:32 PM
A: Because you're the one flying, not time!

Q: What is fire made out of?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 07, 2009, 03:02:02 AM
A: orange juice cans and cotton balls with a little orange tempura paint.


Q:  Why is it harder to take down Christmas lights than it is to put them on?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: ChristineF on January 07, 2009, 03:04:42 AM
a.  "cause its just like packing for the return trip home (WAY HARDEr than packing for the initial trip)

q.  Why do they show such silly movies late at night?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 07, 2009, 03:56:21 AM
A: Cause they'll rot your children's brains after school.

Q:  How do you hunt snipes?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 07, 2009, 09:29:40 AM
A: Wear a red target, run through the woods, and shoot anything that even remotely moves.

Q: If You were awoke by the ghost of Christmas past, what would he serve you?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: wert on January 07, 2009, 09:47:08 PM
A. Hot chocolate and "never more" crow pie
Q. Why do nice guys finish last?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 07, 2009, 10:17:44 PM
A:  Cause they're always stopping to help somebody else.

Q:  How do you make "never more" crow pie?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 08, 2009, 12:52:35 AM
A:  Ask Lenore.  No you can't ask her... nevermore.
Q:  Why do dressmakers assume your shoulders get wider when you gain weight?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 08, 2009, 11:09:32 AM
A: Since your head and neck retain little weight, the shoulders are the next thing down as the food travels to your stomach.

Q: What are the two saddest words in the human language?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 08, 2009, 01:08:10 PM

A:  Go away.

Q:  Why is it that husbands can open jars, but not bottles of cold medicine?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 08, 2009, 01:12:02 PM
A: Because that's not strength proof, it's child proof, and we men never really do grow up.

Q: What were the names of the Seven Dwarves children?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: wert on January 10, 2009, 08:46:54 AM
A. Droolly, Snotty, Stinky, Barfy, Screamy, Dreamy and Doc jr.
B. What is the name of an animal that doesn't fight or run from its enemies?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 10, 2009, 02:19:51 PM
Q:  Lunch.

A:  How many angels can dance on the head of a pin?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: wert on January 10, 2009, 03:10:25 PM
A. 12
Q. What would you give up to have magical powers?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 10, 2009, 04:32:03 PM
A:  My day job, since I'd be pretty busy saving the world AND querying my novel.

Q:  If you could have a super power, one that has never been done before, what would it be?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 10, 2009, 06:44:52 PM
A: The ability to instantly write the perfect query letter.

Q:  Why is traffic always the worst when you're in a hurry?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on January 10, 2009, 06:53:14 PM
A: Because your blood starts to boil, road rage sets in and you realize that everyone else in the world is freakin' slow!

Q: Why are the neighbor's dogs always doin' it when you're outside?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 11, 2009, 08:56:37 AM
A: They thought you were a subscriber.

Q: What's the best defense against aliens?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 11, 2009, 08:59:22 AM
A:  Deodorant

Q:  How do you catch a polar bear?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: wert on January 12, 2009, 08:22:01 AM
A. You coat an Alien with deodorant and when he's incapacitated, tie him up on a prepared iceberg with carefully covered holes and a submarine waiting underneath with its hatch open.

Q. Why do potatoes have eyes?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 12, 2009, 09:12:45 AM
A: All the better to see you with, my dear.

Q: How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: wert on January 13, 2009, 08:17:47 AM
A. Research carried out by Miah and Dr. Shin indicates an average of 413 licks. (I googled. Couldn't help myself, I had no clue for I've never reached the center)

Q. What is the secret of happiness?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 13, 2009, 12:01:51 PM
A: 5 different crayons, pizza with sausage, and telling the time.

Q: If the Kool-aid man  :koolaid: bursts through your house right now and says "Oh yeah!", what is he responding to?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: jacinda on January 13, 2009, 12:23:26 PM
A: All the LSD I put in my coffee this morning.

Q: What exactly is tapioca?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 13, 2009, 01:33:54 PM
A: Grains of casava starch.

Q:  Why did you put LSD in your coffee this morning? ;D
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 13, 2009, 01:39:53 PM
A:  We thought it was Sweet-n-Low.

Q:  Why *IS* Edward Cullen in high school?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: jacinda on January 13, 2009, 02:17:27 PM
A: He keeps failing geometry.

Q: MOTORING.....WHAT'S YOUR PRICE FOR FLIGHT?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 13, 2009, 04:26:13 PM
A:   $9.99 plus shipping and handling.  (karma for Sister Christian!)

Q:  Can a falling icicle really kill you or is that an old wive's tale?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on January 13, 2009, 05:21:37 PM
A: of course, if the mom from "A Christmas Story" say it is then that's the truth!

Q: How do they pack all of that cheese flavor into Cheez-Its?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: AshK on January 14, 2009, 07:43:23 AM
A: of course, if the mom from "A Christmas Story" say it is then that's the truth!

Q: How do they pack all of that cheese flavor into Cheez-Its?

A: They use a machine.

Q: Why did I let my husband get a dog?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: wert on January 14, 2009, 08:08:15 AM
A. Because he needs something to bounce around with its tongue hanging out and wagging its tail. Floppy, drooly love at his heels, leaping to catch Frisbees in its mouth at the park and you refused to do it any longer.

Q. Why does trouble always find me?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 15, 2009, 09:03:13 AM
A: Because you stopped looking for it when you became responsible. It missed you.

Q: What kind of trouble finds you?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 16, 2009, 07:17:09 PM
A:  The sort of trouble that knows how to use GPS.

Q:  Would I lose my head if it wasn't attached?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on January 16, 2009, 09:33:44 PM
A: No, your head needs your hands to write up all of the stories in it.  No losing your hands with you head if it wasn't attatched...

Q: What's blue and smells like red paint?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 17, 2009, 12:10:52 AM
A:  The Blue Boy after painting a bouquet of roses to give to Pinkie on Valentines Day.

Q:  Where are all the agents hiding?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 17, 2009, 09:21:35 AM
A:  Pin~a colada Jelly Bellys, a case of Jolt Cola, and 29 copies of the "Alfred E. Obama" issue of Mad Magazine
Q:  Why does Lisa Simpson carry a banjo-esque case while coming home from school during the majority of the opening credits to the "Simpsons" when she plays a saxophone?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: wert on January 17, 2009, 10:52:05 AM
A. Mad Matt is messing with you.

Q. Why is life like a river?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 18, 2009, 09:10:13 AM
A: Because if it were a highway, I would ride it all night long.

Q: Where does the monster under your bed go when you stop believing?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: wert on January 18, 2009, 11:53:40 AM
A. Back to where they came from. Their mothers basement. They smoke "something", play vids, eat nachos and wait for the nervous kid to turn the light off and leap to the bed from four feet away so as not to get their ankle grabbed by that same monster. This gives them the right to inhabit the darkness under the bed, you know.

Q. Where would you go back to, if you could?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on January 18, 2009, 03:45:07 PM
A: My home planet of Dracus

Q: What is kool-aid really made of? :koolaid:
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 20, 2009, 11:35:13 PM
A:  Jello.  They just take out the stuff that makes it sticky.

Q:  Why is a raven like a writing desk?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 21, 2009, 10:07:30 PM
A:  Because it drives Alice crazy!
Q:  How do you make a root beer float?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: AshK on January 22, 2009, 07:26:02 PM
A:  Jello.  They just take out the stuff that makes it sticky.

Q:  Why is a raven like a writing desk?
:hijack: Srsly. Why is a raven like a writing desk? The husband says this all the time and I never have an answer.
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 22, 2009, 07:44:51 PM

 :hijack: Srsly. Why is a raven like a writing desk? The husband says this all the time and I never have an answer.

(I've never heard a good answer.  The two best I've seen are that they produce flat notes, and that Poe wrote on both of them.)
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on January 22, 2009, 07:58:25 PM
A:  Because it drives Alice crazy!
Q:  How do you make a root beer float?

A: freeze it and toss the bottle in a bathtub full of water!
Q: how often do fiddler crabs molt?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 23, 2009, 08:03:24 AM
A: By shaking what their mama gave 'em.

Q: What do you do when you if you're unstuck in time and don't have a constant?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 23, 2009, 11:32:59 AM
A:  You can either look for an Scotsman who is pining for his girlfriend, fly back through the rip in the universe that dissolved most of the people on your plane, or else wait to be abducted by aliens who want you to breed with a b-rate movie actress.

Q:  Why is it that only the front of your pants get wet when you walk in the rain?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 24, 2009, 07:28:19 AM
A:  Cause you've got a flat booty ... me, my back is always wet  :emb:
Q:  Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 24, 2009, 12:21:32 PM
A:  I don't know, Alaska!  (Get it?  I'll ask -- oh nevermind...)

Q:  Is black the new pink?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on January 24, 2009, 05:34:34 PM
A:  No.

Q:  Where does your lap go when you stand up?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 25, 2009, 04:33:49 AM
A:  Alaska!  (got it!!!! ha ha!)
Q:  What makes grown men and women want to compete in sports where you have to flip your butt up over your head?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 25, 2009, 01:52:47 PM
A:  Because they can.

Q:  Why, in action movies, does the hero do somersaults and backflips whenever he or she has to fight a room full of men or walk or step through a laser activated alarm system?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on January 25, 2009, 03:09:37 PM
A: the same reason why when they make one of those moves, they turn to the camera and give a big, platered on smile! ;D

Q: What happens when a toy indian comes to life?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on January 25, 2009, 07:44:22 PM
A:  They make a family film out of the event.
Q:  What am I supposed to do when the healthfood store runs out of spelt berries again?  (Sorry, It's a "living in the boonies" situation. ??? :'()
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 30, 2009, 10:00:33 AM
A: Spell your own. :wag:

Q: Where should I hide the bodies?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on January 30, 2009, 07:37:38 PM
A: the nearest tar pit.
Q: does anyone want kool-aid? :koolaid:  (I might have a slight obsession,  it's just too good!)
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 30, 2009, 07:43:48 PM
A:  Me! Me!

Q: Why didn't Daniel work as Charlotte's constant?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 31, 2009, 07:58:51 AM
A: Because they're jumping to random points in time and it's not the same two points(like Desmond), a constant is needed in both times and to be stuck. For instance, Penny was talked to in the past and while on the freighter, hence making her a valid constant. At least, I think. Or she didn't eat enough mango.

Q: What is this years pink?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 31, 2009, 10:04:16 AM

A:  Lilac pink, with just a hint of purple.

Q:  What should I invest in?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 31, 2009, 01:25:21 PM
A: Chocolate. Jewelry tarnishes, cars break, stocks fall, but chocolate doesn't hang around long enough to get old.

Q: Why me?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on February 03, 2009, 02:07:21 PM
A: Because I'm not available.  (Sorry. :sad:)
Q:  I look terrible in pink, what is the new green?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: LeahClifford on February 03, 2009, 11:44:25 PM
The new green is  :koolaid:

To what lengths is GG willing to go to avoid working on Book 2 right now?

Edit: hmmm...what lengths is?  What lengths are... I'm not sure which one is right  :huh: I think lengths is a singular measurement and that would make it lengths is but...anyone? Or is it is because I'M singular? 
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: AshK on February 04, 2009, 06:06:27 AM
The same lengths AK is willing to go to in order to avoid working on her Book 2.

Is it acceptable for an unwed heroine get knocked up in a YA fantasy or is that not a genre-appropriate event?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on February 04, 2009, 08:19:34 AM
A: Depends on who she is fighting.

Q: The end of the yellow brick road is the emerald city. What was at the end of the red brick road that circled at the beginning?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Oxlahun on February 04, 2009, 11:16:02 AM
A: the monster that lives ont he moon.

Q: When do spiders sleep?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: LeahClifford on February 04, 2009, 12:04:03 PM
Webever they feel like it (waht waht wahhhhhhh)

How long is a piece of string?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on February 04, 2009, 02:50:57 PM
A: As long as you think it is.

Q: Why isn't everyone telepathic?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on February 04, 2009, 05:53:26 PM

A:  Because if you knew what your man was thinking, you wouldn't be able to stop slapping him.

Q:  How many times can you wear the same shirt in a month?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on February 04, 2009, 06:25:00 PM
A:  As many times as you'd like.

Q:  How long can your friends stand the way you smell after wearing that thing everyday (and night) for a month?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on February 05, 2009, 02:49:53 PM
A: Forever, if you use those little air fresheners for earrings. =D

Q: What do you call a pumpkin with no pumpkin?
(I just had a really weird thought… If there weren't no pumpkin there, there would be. o_O)
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on February 05, 2009, 04:37:22 PM
crust  ;D

What's up?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on February 05, 2009, 04:54:34 PM
A:  The opposite of down
Q:  What am I doing out of bed?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on March 05, 2009, 09:02:59 PM
A:  Pondering.
Q:  If whaletail is such a fashion don't, why are this year's jeans cut so low that I can't sit down without showing rump cleavage?  (TMI?)
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on March 06, 2009, 01:37:51 PM
A:  Because fashion don'ts are in this year.
B:  Why does the first of day of Spring always occur during a snowstorm?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on March 07, 2009, 01:49:23 PM
A: It doesn't here in Illinois.  It's actually quite beautiful and I have all of my windows and doors open. Ahh.

Q:  Why is it that only on the nicest most beautiful early spring days do my parents make me stay inside and clean?  I've never been much of a spring cleaner.  More of a spring reveler.
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on March 07, 2009, 09:45:36 PM
A: Because it is particularly on those beautiful days that inside feels uglier than outside, (especially if the inside is messy), so they clean, to make inside look prettier, even if inside'll never measure up to the magnificence of outside.

Q: What would the world do if fun did not exist? (My answer is 'eat chocolate'. ;D)
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on March 08, 2009, 05:08:07 PM
A:  It would shrivel up and turn to dust.
Q:  Why do dogs like to play with their owner's socks?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: tradergirl on March 08, 2009, 07:10:05 PM
A.  Because they are the Keepers of the Secret-- they alone know where those socks go which vanish in the dryer.  And through their spittle they pass it along to all of cainine kind.

Q.  When will reality TV finally die, so that interesting dramas are once again in vogue?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on March 08, 2009, 07:31:14 PM

A:  As soon as people learn to ignore the attention starved fool who star in a prime time network television shows for free.

Q:  Why do some car dealers assume you'll buy a car after you spend two hours trapped in "the room"?

Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on March 08, 2009, 08:28:54 PM
A:  Because they spent a lot of money on the most obnoxious ties they could find, knowing their funkyness will drive the average consumer CRAZY!

Q:  Does the Kool-Aid man's face ever get tired from smiling all the time?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: LeahClifford on March 09, 2009, 03:05:02 PM
A: OH YEAH!  ;D

Q: Who are you really, wanderer?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: AshK on March 09, 2009, 04:14:44 PM
A. An intern for the IRS.

Q. Why do children find noise amusing?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on March 09, 2009, 05:43:43 PM
A: Because adults find it annoying!
Q: Why does it feel sooooooo cold out today when the thermometer on the fence says it's 62?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on March 09, 2009, 08:27:48 PM

A:  It feels colder because we're all cranky from Daylight Savings Time.

Q:  Am I the only one who finds "Celebrity" Appentice to be a train wreck on many different levels?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on March 10, 2009, 03:09:38 AM
A: No.

Q: What can Brown do for you?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: tradergirl on March 17, 2009, 07:25:31 PM
A. No more and no less than can purple or black, brown's neighbors in the box of 8 crayola crayons.

Q. Oh Magic 8-Ball, is there any good pizza in Hanover, NH?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on March 17, 2009, 09:48:43 PM
A:  Not sure. But, if you have a Super Wal Mart near you, they have Uno's in the refrigerated section of the deli.

Q: Why didn't I take a hint when my computer was acting weird while submitting to the abna?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on April 07, 2009, 07:31:48 PM
A:  Because you thought it might be a good omen.
Q:  Last week's Lost: Cop-out, or *major* cop-out?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on April 07, 2009, 09:12:27 PM
A:  Because you thought it might be a good omen.
Q:  Last week's Lost: Cop-out, or *major* cop-out?

A: Cop out. Season five has been a big disappointment so far for me.
Q: Knock, knock. Who's there?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on April 08, 2009, 01:01:10 PM
A:  Karaoke Crush!
Q:  Why am I still on the internet?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on April 08, 2009, 01:51:01 PM
A:  Because we are just so enthralling that you can't seem to pull yourself away  (exactly how we want you >:D)
Q:  What do you do about the neighbor's incestuous puggles?  (I think there are 18 now???)
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: twoheadknight on April 08, 2009, 02:38:36 PM
A:  Kidnap them and sell them for beer money!  ;D
Q:  Why do water bottles always taste "funky" after being left in a hot car?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on April 08, 2009, 09:27:27 PM
A: Not sure, just know warm water is better than warm beer.
Q: Who would win in a fight: Barack Obama or a ninja?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on April 09, 2009, 01:05:05 AM
A: Obama (he's got Secret Service men who will make a ninja's life a living hell if they try anything.)
Q:  Why do I crave Peeps all year long and then hate them when Easter comes around?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: twoheadknight on April 09, 2009, 02:51:13 PM
A:  Because they're only good when they're stale!
B:  Why do they make peeps into hearts or pumpkins on other holidays?  Pumpkins don't "peep!"
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: tradergirl on April 09, 2009, 07:24:46 PM
A. Because that's what the American economy does best.  Take a good thing, and then take it WAAAYYYYYY too far.  (Crocs, anyone?)

B. Why do I have such a hard time getting my kids into the bathtub.  And then, after they've been in there for forty five minutes, they won't get out?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on April 09, 2009, 07:29:58 PM
A:  Because they aren't old enough to have achy muscles yet.  And after 45 minutes in water the air grows cold!

Q:  What is the most decadant dessert?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on April 10, 2009, 08:50:31 AM
tira mi su a la cecci (it's my personal favorite decadent dessert) with a second of chocolate peanut butter cup pie (or in the case of this crazy ... organic dark, grain sweetened chocolate cashew butter cup pie with a spelt crust -- don't ask.)

Why do all of the crackheads come to my karaoke show and rearrange the barstools into pyramids? (as you can tell, I had a rough night!)
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on April 10, 2009, 01:05:52 PM
A: The crackheads were pyramid builders from ancient Egypt in a previous life and they and they are building a shrine in your honor. Take it as a compliment.

Q: Which place would you like to visit the most: Great Wall of China, Taj Mahal or the Pyramids of Giza in Cairo?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on April 10, 2009, 04:20:52 PM
A: The crackheads were pyramid builders from ancient Egypt in a previous life and they and they are building a shrine in your honor. Take it as a compliment. :rof2:Thanks, I needed that!

Q: Which place would you like to visit the most: Great Wall of China, Taj Mahal or the Pyramids of Giza in Cairo?

A:  Pyramids of Giza in Cairo. 
Q:  How tall is the Easter Bunny, really?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on April 14, 2009, 09:47:08 PM
A: 3 foot nine inches, 5 foot one inch with fully entended ears.
Q: What should I eat for dinner tomorrow night?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on April 15, 2009, 10:55:17 AM
A:  Find a restaurant that gives freebies to taxpayers.

Q:  How should I begin my next novel?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on April 15, 2009, 02:28:47 PM
A: very carefully!  ;D
B:  How in the heck am I going to edit thirty thousand words from my first novel?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on April 15, 2009, 03:30:08 PM
A:  One at a time.

Q: Why do I always lose one earring?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on April 16, 2009, 06:32:45 PM
A: You don't, tiny fairies take them when you are not looking.

Q: If I take steroids, will it make me a better writer?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on April 17, 2009, 12:55:50 AM
A: No, but your fingers will never be tired when you write!
Q: If I use my hot husband's pic as my avatar, will everyone go deaf from the sound of his hotness?  ;D
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on April 17, 2009, 03:24:26 AM
A: It is possible. ;D

Q: How many licks does really it take to get the center of a Tootsie Pop?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on April 18, 2009, 06:46:00 PM
A: Five (I have a really big tongue)

Q: Have you ever hated a movie so much that you got up and left the theatre? (If yes, which movie?)
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on April 20, 2009, 02:06:32 PM
A:  No, but halfway through "Highlander II" my friends and I stopped watching the movie and started chatting.  Nobody shushed us -- we were the only ones left.

Q:  What is the main difference between Donald Trump and the Emperor Nero?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on April 20, 2009, 03:06:05 PM
A: Trump doesn't wear a toga.

Q: Why is black light purple?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on April 21, 2009, 01:52:20 AM
A:  Why not?
Q:  What do you call non-black light posters?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on April 21, 2009, 02:57:25 AM
A: Racist.  :wink:

Q: Are the pyramids really just tombs for the pharaohs of Ancient Egypt, or are they the key to a secret history of human-alien interaction?  :eek:
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: cheermom on April 21, 2009, 02:25:56 PM
A: Neither.  They're very large sundial clocks.

Q: Why can't you tuna fish?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on April 21, 2009, 03:01:47 PM
A: You can... as long as it's a jellyfish ;D
Q: Has there ever been or will there ever be (willingly or otherwise) a teenager who is NOT in volved in some sort of drama?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on April 21, 2009, 03:48:42 PM
 A: Nope!

Q: Are those crazy designs on the new eco-friendly rubber duckies I've seen at the healthfood store good for your eyes?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on April 21, 2009, 08:48:56 PM
A:  Definitely not.

Q:  Where's Waldo?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on April 21, 2009, 10:44:29 PM
A: He's busy encouraging kids to look at pretty pictures instead of reading.

Q: What makes you smile?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on April 22, 2009, 12:15:51 AM
A:  Your answer to my question. ;D  So true…

Q:  I've had Red, White, Green, and Black Tea but… what does Blue Tea taste like?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: cheermom on April 22, 2009, 01:29:55 AM
A: Exactly like Green Tea, before the Yellow is added.

Q: Why do I love this song some much?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on April 22, 2009, 04:54:44 AM
A:  The government encoded secret, subliminal messages in it that force your brain to crave the song like a drug, resulting in millions of purchases everywhere.  Those people are so devious! ;D

Q:  Why is it so much fun to make up conspiracy theories?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on April 22, 2009, 08:36:29 AM
A: Why do you ask? Do you work for the CIA? Homeland security? Are you out to get me?

Q: Why was Kestrel up at 3:54:44 a.m. writing in the forum?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on April 22, 2009, 01:53:58 PM
A:  She wasn't.  It was exactly 1:54:44 a.m., pesky time zones… ;D

Q:  How did Happy Farmers (Jolly Ranchers®), or anyone for that matter, come up the blue raspberry flavor? :huh:
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on April 22, 2009, 02:08:28 PM
A: because red food coloring formula for that kind of candy had been banned for a very long time. As a result, the company tested blue candy with many different "mystery" flavors.  Raspberry was the least mysterious and easiest to decern from the others so it stuck (I really wish I didn't know all of this useless crap sometimes.)
Q:  Why do I remember volumes of useless crap and yet I forget where I put my freakin' keys?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Trist on April 22, 2009, 05:42:35 PM
A:  Because volumes of useless crap are more interesting than keys.

Q:  If a blue moon happens every 2.7154 years, how often does a purple moon happen?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on April 22, 2009, 05:52:05 PM

Q:  Every time you cut off Barney the Dinosaur in Traffic.
A:  What exactly happened at the end of Edith Wharton's "A Journey"?

http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/A_Journey
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: cheermom on April 24, 2009, 12:29:04 AM
A: You get a message that reads, "This page does not provide license information."

Q: Why do men have such an emotional attachment to the tv remote?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on April 24, 2009, 07:51:32 AM
A:  "Ooooh, pretty buttons!"
Q:  Have you ever reunited with a long, lost friend on that (networking) site only to be reminded, a few posts later, why you stopped talking to the fool in the first place?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on April 24, 2009, 08:50:32 AM
A:  Sadly, yes. :(

Q:  Why does pulling teeth sound like more fun than editing another sentence right now? ???
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: cheermom on April 24, 2009, 05:54:17 PM
A: Because if you pulled someone's teeth you wouldn't be suffering like you do when you edit.

Q: Can I still post this response if I don't have a good question?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on April 25, 2009, 08:36:59 AM
A: No.

Q: Why do I like bright, shiny objects like tinfoil and mirror balls?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on April 25, 2009, 05:00:29 PM
A: We all do, it's just the animal in us looking for something to play with!
Q:  Why am I inside on such a lovely day?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on April 25, 2009, 08:22:47 PM
A: Because you are addicted to books and the Query Tracker forum.

Q: Why am I reading the Query Tracker forum on a Saturday night? Shouldn't I have more a life than this?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on April 26, 2009, 01:27:47 AM
A: not if your life is to log on to Query Tracker forum!   ;D
Q:  Does anybody know a good site that deals with Mother-in l-law questions/problems? 
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on April 27, 2009, 09:56:25 PM
A: Querytracker -- just post a question under the "Anything Goes" thread and we will all give you advice.

Q: What is the capital of Mongolia?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: cheermom on April 27, 2009, 10:15:19 PM
A: The 'M'

Q: Why won't my computer read my jump drive?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on April 28, 2009, 07:53:39 AM
A: The 'M'

Q: Why won't my computer read my jump drive?

 :rolf: :rolf:
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on April 28, 2009, 07:56:35 AM
A: Your computer is dyslexic.

Q: Two surrealists walk into a bar. What do they order to drink?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on May 01, 2009, 11:15:48 AM
A: The fish.

Q: Can you answer your own question like I just did?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on May 01, 2009, 11:17:47 AM
A: Of course!

Q: Who is your dream agent?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on May 01, 2009, 04:14:32 PM

A:  His initals are WC.
Q:  Why don't people use their turn signals?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: cheermom on May 01, 2009, 07:10:01 PM
A: They're hoping for a smashing good time.

Q: Am I the only one excited about this weekend's concert?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: YukonMike on May 01, 2009, 11:33:54 PM
A: I am! I think Vanilla Ice is the most underrated artist out there!

Q: I invited my friend and his kids -- ages 5 and 8 -- to a BBQ at my house tomorrow. What should I make?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on May 08, 2009, 09:26:20 PM
A:  ICECREAM!!!!!!! oh, and lots and lots of koolaid! :koolaid:
Q:  I'm a Silver Fire Amphithere.  What kind of dragon are you?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on May 09, 2009, 08:16:48 AM
A: the big, ugly green one that doesn't wanna get her butt kicked if she answers this question incorrectly
Q: How do I rejoice in rejection?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on May 09, 2009, 11:05:49 AM

Q:  With Sugarloaf's "Don't call us (We'll call you)." 

Writer:  Did you get my name?                                :sad:
Agent:  Yeah, I got it when you walked in the door.   >:D

A:  Timothy, timothy, where on earth did you go?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: cheermom on May 11, 2009, 02:50:16 PM
A: He's with Pussycat, Pussycat visiting the queen.

Q: Am I the only parent that's happy school gets out in 3 weeks?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: pilot27407 on May 11, 2009, 07:59:23 PM
A.  Definitely not. All those teachers with kids are ecstatic. Now, they only go to put up with their brats.

Q. How come, money makes the world go round?

Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: luctari on May 13, 2009, 07:33:58 PM
A.  Because all the uncirculated Susan B. Anthnony and Sacagewea dollars are in the US, unbalancing the globe and causing rotation.

Q.  If music be the food of love, what's for dessert?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: pilot27407 on May 13, 2009, 11:38:11 PM
      A. A belly dancer
      Q. Why don’t the just round up the number pi?

Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on May 14, 2009, 03:19:17 AM
A: Because then all the circles would be out of a job.

Q: What exactly does the job of a circle entail?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: luctari on May 14, 2009, 08:19:07 AM
A.  First, you gotta be well rounded.

B.  Who'll stop the rain?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: pilot27407 on May 14, 2009, 09:47:59 AM
A. Dustin Hoffman
Q. Why isn't enough ever enough
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on May 14, 2009, 03:39:56 PM
A: Because if you had enough of enough, it would be too much.

Q: Why is it that I've memorized The Incredibles word for word after seeing it a couple times, but I can't remember people's names that I've been in class with all year?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: pilot27407 on May 15, 2009, 06:30:45 PM
A.  Their faces obstruct you.
Q.  How do you tell summer’s here?

Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: luctari on May 17, 2009, 09:11:50 AM
A.  Mojitos.
B.  Where's I leave the f*ing asprin?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: pilot27407 on May 17, 2009, 09:28:17 AM
A. here, on my desk
Q. why do I have to edit?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on May 19, 2009, 04:17:06 PM
A: because it's not goin' to happen on it's own. 
Q: Why do the good ones die young?  :(
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: luctari on May 19, 2009, 05:17:47 PM
A.  Because I made them characters in my book, which is kind of like being handed a red shirt on Star Trek
B.  What is the sound of one hand querying?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on May 21, 2009, 05:04:41 AM
A: (search) tap .. (peck) tap .. (search) tap ...
Q: Oh, what did I do now?  :rant: LOL
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: pilot27407 on May 21, 2009, 09:17:06 AM
A. you forgot to change your dippers.
Q. Why do my lips move when I talk?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on May 21, 2009, 02:52:50 PM
A:  You're a lousy ventriloquist.
Q:  Was the new Wolverine movie :hearts: as made of awesome as I think it was?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on May 22, 2009, 12:05:17 AM
A: of course ... and they added a teaspoon of splendid for flavor!!
Q:  Does the Koolaid man's arms ever get tired from being in that position all the time? :koolaid:
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: cheermom on May 22, 2009, 01:26:40 AM
A:  His arms aren't like that all of the time.  He's like the refrigerator dude.  When no one's signed on, he puts his arms down.

Q:  Do you want fries with that?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: pilot27407 on May 22, 2009, 07:49:30 AM
A. No, thank you, just the hot oil.
Q. Why do women use pants?


Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on May 22, 2009, 09:39:50 AM

A:  As in trousers?  Primarily to avoid pantyhose.
Q:  What is the best way to introduce backstory into a scene without dialogue?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on May 22, 2009, 03:11:40 PM
A:  I find linking a memory to a visual cue ... such as: The dishes were stacked in the sink just the way they were when ... works well as a starting point for introducing backstory.  But that's just me.
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dragonlady on May 23, 2009, 08:09:55 PM
KC! You didn't ask a question!  Oh well, my turn!

Q:  Why is it that I can attract mosquitoes from five miles away when no one around me gets a single bite?  (Grrrrrrr.)
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on May 23, 2009, 10:14:56 PM
A:  I find linking a memory to a visual cue ... such as: The dishes were stacked in the sink just the way they were when ... works well as a starting point for introducing backstory.  But that's just me.
KC! You didn't ask a question!  Oh well, my turn!

Q:  Why is it that I can attract mosquitoes from five miles away when no one around me gets a single bite?  (Grrrrrrr.)
A: Vitamin B6 ... they have a lot, you don't
Q: what happened to the question in my post... I swear there was one! LOL
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: pilot27407 on May 24, 2009, 03:02:32 PM
A. I ate it.... yum, yum.
Q. Why do we use names? What's wrong with just... hay you!
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on May 25, 2009, 03:39:03 PM
A:  Because hay is for horses.  :wag:

Q:  Why can't you run a donation-based lemonade stand on federal property?  :sad:
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: violet on May 25, 2009, 04:18:22 PM
A: You could, but then you'd be taxed.
Q: why does Suze Orman still have a job?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on May 27, 2009, 08:07:14 PM
A: Good Question!
Q: If I can fix the sink, load 800 pounds of biz equiptment out of the van only to load a brand new washer in then take it home, unload it and hook it up, REload the van, cook the dinner and send out queries without breaking a sweat or a nail -- why is my name still KC and not "Superchick" or "SHE-RAH"?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: luctari on May 27, 2009, 09:48:13 PM
A. 'Cause KC stands for Kosmic Champion.
Q.  How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if its agent gets 15%?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kestrel on May 28, 2009, 12:29:14 AM
A:  15% more than normal to make up the difference.

Q:  Why is there no sunshine when she's gone?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on June 01, 2009, 03:29:28 PM
A: cause "she" is mother nature
Q: If you're going through the desert on a horse, wouldn't you try to think up a name for him?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: cheermom on June 01, 2009, 03:53:43 PM
A: Nah, he'll be the only horse there, so it's not like you'd confuse him with the others.

Q: It doesn't rain in the desert, how come I've had 10 days of it?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: luctari on June 01, 2009, 03:56:51 PM
A.  Haven't you been watching CNN?   It's the Cheney season.

Q.  Why have my knees gotten so much older than the rest of me?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: QuietWriter on June 02, 2009, 02:48:24 PM
A: Because that's one part of the anatomy God really dropped the ball on.
Q: Why do my kids never nap at the same time?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: cheermom on June 02, 2009, 05:28:37 PM
A: Because if they did, you'd have time to rest...and mom's aren't allowed to rest.

Q: If olive oil is made from olives and coconut oil from coconuts, what's baby oil made from?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on June 09, 2009, 01:11:03 PM
A:  Magpie's children.  That's why they've set up a watch, and have taken to sleeping in shifts.

Q:  Why can't I ever remember how to spell "necessary"?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Cujo5 on June 09, 2009, 03:25:58 PM
A: Because MS Word needs something to do while your writing.
Q: If practice makes perfects and nobody's perfect, why practice?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on July 06, 2009, 12:46:54 PM
A:  Because 90% of success is showing up for practice.
Q:  How am I supposed to personalize a query letter to submissions@bigagency,com?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: cipherqueen on July 06, 2009, 01:37:00 PM
A: You don't include a salutation.
Q: Why is there so little time but so many distractions?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: isinglass on July 07, 2009, 04:49:40 AM
A. Distractions feed on time. They gobble up pieces of it when you're not looking.
Q. Why does my cat insist on curling up right on my mouse pad when most of the desk is empty?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: cheermom on July 07, 2009, 05:25:22 AM
A: Because cats like mice and she knows one will be there sooner or later.

Q: Why do I always want chocolate 10 minutes after the store closes?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: luctari on July 07, 2009, 09:17:26 AM
A.  Because absence makes the heart grow fonder, or is it fondue?

Q.  Why are all six of the pens in my drawer out of f***ing ink?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on July 08, 2009, 12:36:27 PM
Because absence makes the heart grow fonder, or is it fondue?

Groan!    :faint2:  (Good one)

Quote
Q.  Why are all six of the pens in my drawer out of f***ing ink?

A:  Solidarity.
Q:  What's the best book you've read lately?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on July 12, 2009, 09:18:18 PM
A: the dictionary
Q: where have i been lately?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: luctari on July 12, 2009, 10:44:06 PM
A.  Wherever you've been, there you were
Q.  Who would fardels bear?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: laurabdiamond on July 12, 2009, 11:59:34 PM
A: Quagmire from Family Guy or Kenny from South Park   :ban:

Q: Why is it I always seem to be in the slowest moving checkout line even though it may be the shortest?
 :bang:
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: cheermom on July 13, 2009, 01:49:57 PM
A: It's the universe's way of giving you a minute to catch your breath.

Q: Where did my husband hide my birthday gift?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: karaokecrush on July 13, 2009, 09:59:00 PM
A: I'm not telling! ha ha ;D
Q:  Why do the scammers always pic on me?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 13, 2015, 03:50:18 AM
A: I'm not telling! ha ha ;D
Q:  Why do the scammers always pic on me?

A: Because they can see you from a mile away.
Q: Why aren't there the same number of buns as there are hotdogs in a package?


*Hahaha  this is one of those oldies the guests keep viewing that I get a kick out of reading. 
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 13, 2015, 12:08:13 PM
A:  Because buns go bad and hotdogs have the shelf life of plutonium.
Q:  Why aren't pumpkin scented/flavored goodies sold all year long?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: SamIAm on January 13, 2015, 12:19:54 PM
A:  Because buns go bad and hotdogs have the shelf life of plutonium.
Q:  Why aren't pumpkin scented/flavored goodies sold all year long?


A: Because the pumpkins had a meeting and decided against it.
Q: Where are most of the people who started this thread?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dani Donegan (Cradle) on January 13, 2015, 12:27:41 PM
A: Because the pumpkins had a meeting and decided against it.
Q: Where are most of the people who started this thread?

A: I got hungry... *pats stomach*
Q Which is worse: forgetting everything or never remembering anything new?

Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Tabris on January 13, 2015, 02:23:44 PM
A: Because the pumpkins had a meeting and decided against it.
Q: Where are most of the people who started this thread?

A: I got hungry... *pats stomach*
Q Which is worse: forgetting everything or never remembering anything new?



A: I can't remember.
Q: Why do we park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 13, 2015, 02:26:37 PM
A: Because Watermelon don't have bones...

Q: how much wood can a woodchuck chuck?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: HLHumbert on January 13, 2015, 02:58:31 PM
A: Because Watermelon don't have bones...

Q: how much wood can a woodchuck chuck?

A: Enough to heat their burrows for six more weeks of winter.
Q: What do you store in your boat shed?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 13, 2015, 03:20:09 PM
A:  The bones of Cradle's victims.
Q:  Why do people with straight hair need to curl it and and the people with curly hair need to straighten it?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 13, 2015, 03:48:54 PM
A - Semantics


Q - can one person eat the moon?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 13, 2015, 03:49:11 PM
A:  The bones of Cradle's victims.
Q:  Why do people with straight hair need to curl it and and the people with curly hair need to straighten it?

A: Because the grass is always greener...
Q: Why doesn't plain coffee taste as good as it smells?



Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dani Donegan (Cradle) on January 14, 2015, 01:50:14 PM
A:  The bones of Cradle's victims.
Q:  Why do people with straight hair need to curl it and and the people with curly hair need to straighten it?

A: Because the grass is always greener...
Q: Why doesn't plain coffee taste as good as it smells?





A: Aliens.
Q: Is the light at the end of the tunnel just us getting pushed out--through birth--into the next life?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: slightlysmall on January 14, 2015, 01:54:42 PM

A: Aliens.
Q: Is the light at the end of the tunnel just us getting pushed out--through birth--into the next life?

A: Sort of, but it's actually someone shining a flashlight in your eyes.
Q: Do expensive microwaveable lunches taste better than cheap microwaveable lunches?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 14, 2015, 02:05:45 PM

A: Aliens.
Q: Is the light at the end of the tunnel just us getting pushed out--through birth--into the next life?

A: Sort of, but it's actually someone shining a flashlight in your eyes.
Q: Do expensive microwaveable lunches taste better than cheap microwaveable lunches?

A: sadly I actually know the answer here and it is YES.
Q: If I let the sunshine in, will it be the Age of Aquarius?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: awarwick on January 14, 2015, 02:20:44 PM

A: Aliens.
Q: Is the light at the end of the tunnel just us getting pushed out--through birth--into the next life?

A: Sort of, but it's actually someone shining a flashlight in your eyes.
Q: Do expensive microwaveable lunches taste better than cheap microwaveable lunches?

A: sadly I actually know the answer here and it is YES.
Q: If I let the sunshine in, will it be the Age of Aquarius?


A: No, because I'm a Libra.
Q: Why do people hold up their pinkies when drinking tea?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: slightlysmall on January 14, 2015, 02:38:45 PM
A: Because it's too hard to hold up their thumbs.
Q: Does 20-lb paper actually support 20 pounds?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 14, 2015, 02:41:48 PM
A: Because it's too hard to hold up their thumbs.
Q: Does 20-lb paper actually support 20 pounds?

A: European or African?
Q: When the clock strikes 9, does the union mandate he be back on the job for 10?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: quiarahb on January 14, 2015, 03:15:39 PM
A: European or African?
Q: When the clock strikes 9, does the union mandate he be back on the job for 10?
[/quote]

A: No, because that's surf time.
Q: If chickens cross the road to get to the other side, what's so great on this other side that made them want to cross in the first place?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: HLHumbert on January 14, 2015, 03:17:18 PM
Quote
A: European or African?
Q: When the clock strikes 9, does the union mandate he be back on the job for 10?

A: No, because that's surf time.
Q: If chickens cross the road to get to the other side, what's so great on this other side that made them want to cross in the first place?

A: They have cookies.
Q: Where do you keep your friend Petey?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: SamIAm on January 14, 2015, 03:35:07 PM
Quote
A: European or African?
Q: When the clock strikes 9, does the union mandate he be back on the job for 10?

A: No, because that's surf time.
Q: If chickens cross the road to get to the other side, what's so great on this other side that made them want to cross in the first place?

A: They have cookies.
Q: Where do you keep your friend Petey?

A: If I told you, I'd have to kill you.
Q: Where's my freaking Hogwarts acceptance letter already?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dani Donegan (Cradle) on January 14, 2015, 03:39:29 PM

A: If I told you, I'd have to kill you.
Q: Where's my freaking Hogwarts acceptance letter already?

A: I got hungry. Again.

Q: How come no matter how hard I try, I can never become a Super Saiyan and collect all the dragon balls?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on January 14, 2015, 03:45:40 PM

A: I got hungry. Again.

Q: How come no matter how hard I try, I can never become a Super Saiyan and collect all the dragon balls?

A: Because all the dragons are dead.

Q: Why can't I name my child Hannibal?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 14, 2015, 04:34:22 PM
A:  Because you don't have a child.
Q:  What rhymes with purple?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 14, 2015, 04:38:06 PM
A:  Because you don't have a child.
Q:  What rhymes with purple?

A: Nurple  ( for anyone who's received a 'purple nurple' )
Q: What goes up, but never comes down?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on January 14, 2015, 04:39:26 PM
A: Nurple  ( for anyone who's received a 'purple nurple' )
Q: What goes up, but never comes down?

A. The national debt.

Q: Why is dog man's best friend?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 14, 2015, 04:47:02 PM
A: Nurple  ( for anyone who's received a 'purple nurple' )
Q: What goes up, but never comes down?

A. The national debt.

Q: Why is dog man's best friend?

Hahahaha  It's true, but I was thinking someone's age.  lol   It's a joke from my kidhood days.

A: Because cats are too smart.

Q: Just why is the grass always greener on the other side of the fence?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on January 14, 2015, 05:14:59 PM
Hahahaha  It's true, but I was thinking someone's age.  lol   It's a joke from my kidhood days.

A: Because cats are too smart.

Q: Just why is the grass always greener on the other side of the fence?

A: Because the owner of the lawn can afford a scheduled watering service/sprinkles.

Q: What came first, the chicken or the egg?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 14, 2015, 05:21:02 PM
Hahahaha  It's true, but I was thinking someone's age.  lol   It's a joke from my kidhood days.

A: Because cats are too smart.

Q: Just why is the grass always greener on the other side of the fence?

A: Because the owner of the lawn can afford a scheduled watering service/sprinkles.

Q: What came first, the chicken or the egg?



A: Tacos   

Q: Why does time go faster the older you get?

Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on January 14, 2015, 05:37:59 PM

A: Tacos   

Q: Why does time go faster the older you get?



A: Because you're speeding towards death.

Q: What's the opposite of progress?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 14, 2015, 05:39:27 PM

A: Tacos   

Q: Why does time go faster the older you get?



A: Because you're speeding towards death.

Q: What's the opposite of progress?

A: Congress

Q: Why is the sky blue...I mean, why is it so sad?  ; )
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on January 14, 2015, 05:40:30 PM
A: Congress

Q: Why is the sky blue...I mean, why is it so sad?  ; )

A: You'd be sad too if your only friends were geese.

Q: What's black and white and red all over?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: quiarahb on January 14, 2015, 05:43:04 PM

A: Tacos   

Q: Why does time go faster the older you get?



A: Because you're speeding towards death.

Q: What's the opposite of progress?

A: Bouncy Houses
Q: where, oh where has my little dog gone? Oh, where, oh where can he be?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 14, 2015, 05:45:04 PM
A: Congress

Q: Why is the sky blue...I mean, why is it so sad?  ; )

A: You'd be sad too if your only friends were geese.

Q: What's black and white and red all over?

A: a newspaper

Q: why don't elephants ever forget?....are they grudge holders?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: HLHumbert on January 15, 2015, 01:36:33 PM
A: No, they're part of a worldwide mafia.
Q: What is the name of the cat who was let out of the bag?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 15, 2015, 01:41:16 PM
a.) Dog
b.) sometimes I think I want to fly?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dani Donegan (Cradle) on January 15, 2015, 01:51:55 PM
a.) Dog
b.) sometimes I think I want to fly?

A: Drugs are bad, mkay?
Q: Why can't I catch all the Pokémons?  :'(
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 15, 2015, 06:46:26 PM
a.) Dog
b.) sometimes I think I want to fly?

A: Drugs are bad, mkay?   Hahaha   that's from south park
Q: Why can't I catch all the Pokémons?  :'(

A: Because you are too damn slow  ; )

Q: why does your nose run when you cry? 
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 15, 2015, 08:54:37 PM
A:  Cause walking isn't the right reaction
Q:  Who would win in a wrestling match, Lemmy or God?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 15, 2015, 08:59:37 PM
A:  Cause walking isn't the right reaction
Q:  Who would win in a wrestling match, Lemmy or God?

A: God

Q: Why does a grouping of crows spell murder?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Missus Braidyhead on January 15, 2015, 09:55:42 PM
A: God

Q: Why does a grouping of crows spell murder?

A: Because they quit school before they could learn to spell anything else.

Q: Where is my Magic 8 Ball when I need it?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on January 15, 2015, 09:59:13 PM
A: Because they quit school before they could learn to spell anything else.

Q: Where is my Magic 8 Ball when I need it?

A: It left. It wants you to handle your personal issues on your own.

Q: What color is the sky?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 15, 2015, 10:10:23 PM
A: Because they quit school before they could learn to spell anything else.

Q: Where is my Magic 8 Ball when I need it?

A: It left. It wants you to handle your personal issues on your own.

Q: What color is the sky?


A: Depends on the weather and time of day.

Q: If I fixed a broken mirror that I didn't break, does it mean I'll have 7 yrs. of good luck?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 16, 2015, 11:37:01 AM
A:  yes but only in finding the occasional penny on the sidewalk.
Q:  What happens when the clock strikes 13?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on January 16, 2015, 03:37:33 PM
A:  yes but only in finding the occasional penny on the sidewalk.
Q:  What happens when the clock strikes 13?

A: The universe as we know it ceases to exist.

Q: What is a negative number?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 16, 2015, 03:47:33 PM
A:  yes but only in finding the occasional penny on the sidewalk.
Q:  What happens when the clock strikes 13?

A: The universe as we know it ceases to exist.

Q: What is a negative number?

A: 7, because it 8 9

Q: Why do birds suddenly appear whenever you are near?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 16, 2015, 03:53:34 PM
a:  Cause the chicks dig birds
q:  How do you know if your in the danger zone?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: HLHumbert on January 16, 2015, 03:55:33 PM

A: Darth Vader declares that he's your father.
Q: What would you rather have as a "guard dog", an orc or a balrog?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 16, 2015, 04:22:28 PM

A: Darth Vader declares that he's your father.
Q: What would you rather have as a "guard dog", an orc or a balrog?

A: Bigfoot

Q: Why does my nose always get itchy when my hands are full?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dani Donegan (Cradle) on January 16, 2015, 08:51:10 PM

A: Darth Vader declares that he's your father.
Q: What would you rather have as a "guard dog", an orc or a balrog?

A: Bigfoot

Q: Why does my nose always get itchy when my hands are full?

A: Because it nose your hands are full.
Q: Do you BEEEEELIIEVE in life after love?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on January 16, 2015, 09:13:12 PM

A: Because it nose your hands are full.
Q: Do you BEEEEELIIEVE in life after love?

A: Well, since love is technically a chemical spreading through your brain if you suddenly cannot produce these chemicals you're probably either dead or a sociopath. Neither of which I'd qualify as living. Especially the dead option.

Q: What song do I have stuck in my head?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: munley on January 16, 2015, 09:19:10 PM


Q: What song do I have stuck in my head?

A.  "Somewhere over the Rainbow."


B.  What would have happened if Dorothy had bonked the WW with Fifty Shades of Gray instead of grabbing that bucket?

[ Here is 1.5 minute-refresher if you forgot the scene]:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aopdD9Cu-So
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on January 16, 2015, 09:25:29 PM

A.  "Somewhere over the Rainbow."


B.  What would have happened if Dorothy had bonked the WW with Fifty Shades of Gray instead of grabbing that bucket?

[ Here is 1.5 minute-refresher if you forgot the scene]:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aopdD9Cu-So

A: She would've read it and they would've fangirled over Christian Grey (Edward) and tried to do the kink. And possibly died BECAUSE 50 SHADES IS NOT A HEALTHY PORTRAYAL OF BDSM *ahem*

Q: Team Edward or Team Jacob?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dani Donegan (Cradle) on January 16, 2015, 09:28:23 PM

A.  "Somewhere over the Rainbow."


B.  What would have happened if Dorothy had bonked the WW with Fifty Shades of Gray instead of grabbing that bucket?

[ Here is 1.5 minute-refresher if you forgot the scene]:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aopdD9Cu-So

A: She would've read it and they would've fangirled over Christian Grey (Edward) and tried to do the kink. And possibly died BECAUSE 50 SHADES IS NOT A HEALTHY PORTRAYAL OF BDSM *ahem*

Q: Team Edward or Team Jacob?

A: Team Victoria
Q: Glass half full, glass half empty, or just more room for vodka?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 16, 2015, 09:30:52 PM

A.  "Somewhere over the Rainbow."


B.  What would have happened if Dorothy had bonked the WW with Fifty Shades of Gray instead of grabbing that bucket?

[ Here is 1.5 minute-refresher if you forgot the scene]:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aopdD9Cu-So

A: She would've read it and they would've fangirled over Christian Grey (Edward) and tried to do the kink. And possibly died BECAUSE 50 SHADES IS NOT A HEALTHY PORTRAYAL OF BDSM *ahem*

Q: Team Edward or Team Jacob?

A: Team Victoria
Q: Glass half full, glass half empty, or just more room for vodka?

A: screw it with orange juice   (meaning making it a screwdriver - the drink, for those who might be, WTF?)

Q: orange you glad I didn't say banana?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Karloff on January 16, 2015, 11:14:36 PM

A.  "Somewhere over the Rainbow."


B.  What would have happened if Dorothy had bonked the WW with Fifty Shades of Gray instead of grabbing that bucket?

[ Here is 1.5 minute-refresher if you forgot the scene]:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aopdD9Cu-So

A: She would've read it and they would've fangirled over Christian Grey (Edward) and tried to do the kink. And possibly died BECAUSE 50 SHADES IS NOT A HEALTHY PORTRAYAL OF BDSM *ahem*

Q: Team Edward or Team Jacob?

A: Team Victoria
Q: Glass half full, glass half empty, or just more room for vodka?

A: screw it with orange juice   (meaning making it a screwdriver - the drink, for those who might be, WTF?)

Q: orange you glad I didn't say banana?


A - Yes

Q - Where's Waldo?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on January 16, 2015, 11:17:06 PM


A - Yes

Q - Where's Waldo?

A: He's climbin in your windows
He's snatchin your people up

Q: What noise does a Zebra make?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dani Donegan (Cradle) on January 16, 2015, 11:18:44 PM
^
A: A zebra makes grass noises like bunnies make carrot noises.

Q: Turn down for what?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Karloff on January 16, 2015, 11:22:39 PM
^
A: A zebra makes grass noises like bunnies make carrot noises.

Q: Turn down for what?

A - candy offered by strangers.

Q - if I only get scared half to death, can I collect half my life insurance policy?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on January 16, 2015, 11:23:34 PM

A - candy offered by strangers.

Q - if I only get scared half to death, can I collect half my life insurance policy?


A: Only if you track your vital signs to prove it.

Q: Why is burning your tongue so awful?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 16, 2015, 11:28:10 PM

A - candy offered by strangers.

Q - if I only get scared half to death, can I collect half my life insurance policy?


A: Only if you track your vital signs to prove it.

Q: Why is burning your tongue so awful?


A: Who said it was?


Q: If all the world's a stage, where does the audience sit?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Karloff on January 16, 2015, 11:37:32 PM

A - candy offered by strangers.

Q - if I only get scared half to death, can I collect half my life insurance policy?


A: Only if you track your vital signs to prove it.

Q: Why is burning your tongue so awful?


A: Who said it was?


Q: If all the world's a stage, where does the audience sit?

A - purgatory

Q - what would happen if Batman got bitten by a vampire?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: munley on January 16, 2015, 11:58:29 PM


A - purgatory

Q - what would happen if Batman got bitten by a vampire?

A. He'd have to re-vamp his empire.

B. Why is it that you always find what you're searching for in the last place you look?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: HLHumbert on January 17, 2015, 08:37:07 AM


A - purgatory

Q - what would happen if Batman got bitten by a vampire?

A. He'd have to re-vamp his empire.

B. Why is it that you always find what you're searching for in the last place you look?

A: Because only shopaholics keep looking after they've found what they wanted.
Q: How does one achieve the level of genius that prompts the mixing of two starches together to create something as wonderful as cheesy-potato perogies?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 17, 2015, 09:02:51 AM
A: 42

Q:  what does the fox say?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: slightlysmall on January 17, 2015, 10:37:43 AM
A: 42

Q:  what does the fox say?

A:
(http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/81/ee/a3/81eea3950570b5d9bb1aab00016424c6.jpg)

Q: Why do tired babies refuse to sleep?

Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: munley on January 17, 2015, 10:54:08 AM
Question from SlightlySmall: Why do tired babies refuse to sleep?

A. Because they'd rather go bump in the night.

Q.  What is the Canadian Postal Code for the North Pole?
(alternates letters and numbers for total of 6 characters).
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 17, 2015, 12:29:48 PM
A: 2cld4I
Q:  Why are pants/trousers/panties/boxers/briefs/underpants plural?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: HLHumbert on January 17, 2015, 12:38:00 PM
A: Because Vidar is the only one who would wear pants with only one leg.
Q: Do vampires get drunk if they drink the blood of an alcoholic?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 17, 2015, 04:07:48 PM
A: Because Vidar is the only one who would wear pants with only one leg.
Q: Do vampires get drunk if they drink the blood of an alcoholic?

A: Only if the alcoholic is drunk at the time of the vampire's bite.

Q: Why is it in movies that people point the flashlight at their face when they check to see if it will work?  I mean, they are in the dark, the beam of light would be visible, so why must they point it at their face to check?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 17, 2015, 11:05:51 PM
A- because everyone's iq points drop by 60 on the big screen

Q - what did she wear that night?


(Also. The north poles postal code is actually H0H 0H0, no joke)
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on January 17, 2015, 11:25:23 PM
A- because everyone's iq points drop by 60 on the big screen

Q - what did she wear that night?


(Also. The north poles postal code is actually H0H 0H0, no joke)

Q: Why is it any of your business?

A: If you had a hammer, what would with it?

(Seriously? WHOA)
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 18, 2015, 09:07:54 AM
A:  I'd hammer out danger, I'd hammer out a warning, I'd hammer out love between my brothers and my sisters, All over this land.

Q:  Why are movie soundtracks now mixed so that I have to turn the volume way up to hear the dialogue but need to be instantly on the control to turn it down if there is a gunfight or explosion? 
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: munley on January 18, 2015, 10:39:55 AM

Q:  Why are movie soundtracks now mixed so that I have to turn the volume way up to hear the dialogue but need to be instantly on the control to turn it down if there is a gunfight or explosion? 

A.  All advertisements get turned up extra loud.

Q.  Why are dogs' noses always clammy?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: catsandstuff on January 18, 2015, 11:52:11 AM
A. It's their magical power, along with stealthy face-licking (where upon their tongues find their way into your eyeball, nose, and mouth)

Q. Why do wedgies happen?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: munley on January 18, 2015, 12:30:46 PM

Q. Why do wedgies happen?

A. They are performed by somebody accidentally latching onto the back of your underwear while flailing around with his head up where the sun doesn't shine.

Q.  What is elbow grease made out of?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: PinkyHasABrain on January 18, 2015, 01:13:34 PM
Answer- The run-off from armpit sweat.

Question- How much is an "assload"?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: HLHumbert on January 18, 2015, 01:51:12 PM
A: It's equal to the average weight of the Democratic members serving in Congress during any given term.
Q: What is your preferred color for motor vehicles?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 18, 2015, 02:45:52 PM
A - mirror

Q - what time is the best time to reveal you have explosive diarhea?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: PinkyHasABrain on January 18, 2015, 02:59:52 PM
A- the first date.
Q- what kind of animal is snuffle-luffa-gus on sesame street???
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: catsandstuff on January 18, 2015, 04:00:27 PM
A - A candidate for a Canadian romance novel :)

Q - How drunk is too drunk?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 18, 2015, 06:49:27 PM
A - A candidate for a Canadian romance novel :)

Q - How drunk is too drunk?

A: When you see pink elephants.

Q: Where's Waldo?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: munley on January 18, 2015, 07:09:28 PM

Q: Where's Waldo?

A. Waldo is mopping floors at the Waldorf Hotel in New York, graveyard shift.

Q. Who's on first?

Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 18, 2015, 07:49:52 PM

Q: Where's Waldo?

A. Waldo is mopping floors at the Waldorf Hotel in New York, graveyard shift.

Q. Who's on first?



A: You are, so you better start paying attention to the game.

Q: Do cannibals not eat clowns because they think they would taste funny?

Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: PinkyHasABrain on January 19, 2015, 09:02:39 AM
Answer- No bc clowns haven't been funny in years. They don't eat politicians bc they taste like crap, though.

question- If the kool-aide man got thirsty- would he have a glass of kool-aide- or would that be weird?  :koolaid:
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 19, 2015, 11:48:35 AM
A - it would be weird for the same reason that watering an apple tree with apple juice is forced cannabilism...

Q - red or blue?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 19, 2015, 05:13:41 PM
A - it would be weird for the same reason that watering an apple tree with apple juice is forced cannabilism...

Q - red or blue?

A: I can't decide.

Q: Why isn't barkdust called barkchunks?  It's more accurate. 
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 19, 2015, 06:01:14 PM
A:  Because barkchunks sound like something you do when you're ill.
Q:  What is barkdust?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on January 19, 2015, 06:31:28 PM
A:  Because barkchunks sound like something you do when you're ill.
Q:  What is barkdust?

A: Dust from bark? What else?

Q: Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 19, 2015, 06:47:10 PM
A:  Because barkchunks sound like something you do when you're ill.
Q:  What is barkdust?

A: Dust from bark? What else?

Q: Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon?

A: Only in my dreams.

Q: Why must it take more muscles to frown than to smile? 
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: HLHumbert on January 19, 2015, 07:12:45 PM
A:  Because barkchunks sound like something you do when you're ill.
Q:  What is barkdust?

A: Dust from bark? What else?

Q: Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon?

A: Only in my dreams.

Q: Why must it take more muscles to frown than to smile? 

A: Because karma's a bitch.
Q: What would you not want to take to a deserted island?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: bodwen on January 19, 2015, 07:16:01 PM
A:  My mother in law (unless I can just leave her there)
Q:  If it's easier to smile than frown, why do I get resting bitch face?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 19, 2015, 07:19:42 PM
A:  My mother in law (unless I can just leave her there)
Q:  If it's easier to smile than frown, why do I get resting bitch face?

A: oops.  It actually takes fewer muscles to frown than smile.  That's why you have your resting bitch face.

Q: will my dyslexia ever stop embarrassing me?


(okay, this is funny because for the longest time I saw Bodwen as Bowden, so it's funny to make a dyslexia error she responds to)
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: catsandstuff on January 19, 2015, 08:08:34 PM
A - One smart fellow, he smelt fart

Q - Why are animal-shaped slippers so amusing?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 19, 2015, 08:30:48 PM
A - why not?

Q - if I pick a midnight train from nowhere, where do i end up?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: catsandstuff on January 19, 2015, 08:34:34 PM
A: Middlesex, Pennsylvania

Q: What's the best thing to say in a crowded elevator?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 19, 2015, 08:40:23 PM
A - It doesn't matter so long as it ends with "According to the prophecy"

q - Why not white after labor day?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: munley on January 19, 2015, 09:06:15 PM


q - Why not white after labor day?

A.  Because that's when the ghosts go on strike.

Q.  In English, why is  Q  always followed by  U ?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 20, 2015, 04:42:53 AM


A.  Because that's when the ghosts go on strike.

Q.  In English, why is  Q  always followed by  U ?

A: Because they are fraternal twins who were separated at birth.  Once they found each other, they never wanted to be apart again.

Q: Why does the caged bird sing? 
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 20, 2015, 07:35:03 AM
A - Because the cross dresser that work there have great voices.

Q - How soon is now?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: SamIAm on January 20, 2015, 08:15:12 AM
A - Because the cross dresser that work there have great voices.

Q - How soon is now?

A: Oops. You missed it.

Q: Why is it called a platypus?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: PinkyHasABrain on January 20, 2015, 12:53:30 PM
A- Because duck-beaver-mutant animal, is a mouthful

Q-Who invented tooth picks?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 20, 2015, 12:57:07 PM
A - No one, they have always existed...

Q - if "Whatever" is the answer, what is the question?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: HLHumbert on January 20, 2015, 03:45:05 PM
A - No one, they have always existed...

Q - if "Whatever" is the answer, what is the question?

A: Who killed the cat that ate the bat that was eating all of the mosquitoes which hatched out of the puddle created when we cleaned up the carcass of the neighbor's dog that got hit by a drunk driver on the anniversary of the death of all things stupid?

Q: Who let the dog out in the first place?



Also:
A: Middlesex, Pennsylvania

Q: Why didn't you send him to Intercourse, PA instead?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 20, 2015, 03:47:38 PM
A - No one, they have always existed...

Q - if "Whatever" is the answer, what is the question?

A: Who killed the cat that ate the bat that was eating all of the mosquitoes which hatched out of the puddle created when we cleaned up the carcass of the neighbor's dog that got hit by a drunk driver on the anniversary of the death of all things stupid?

Q: Who let the dog out in the first place?


A: The cat.

Q: Why shouldn't you look a gift horse in the mouth?

Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 20, 2015, 05:34:04 PM
a - bad breath

Q - in five words or less, what us mans exestential problem?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 20, 2015, 05:43:26 PM
a - bad breath

Q - in five words or less, what us mans exestential problem?

A: He thinks he MUST conquer.

Q: Did you know papa was a rolling stone?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: munley on January 23, 2015, 08:54:33 PM


Q: Did you know papa was a rolling stone?

A. Oh. I thought they said he had kidney stones.

Q. What kind of pie is it that's in the sky when you die after living in retched poverty from day one of your life?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 23, 2015, 10:08:49 PM
A - Peacan of course...

Q - How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: munley on January 24, 2015, 04:16:38 AM


Q - How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?

A.  For a dog, 99.  For a rough-tongue feline, 66.

Q.  Why do cats have to go and knead the whole puffy comforter before plopping themselves down right up against your nostrils?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: PinkyHasABrain on February 02, 2015, 01:34:22 PM
A- Its all part of their evil plan to take over the world and form a new "kittyverse"

Q- Is it REALLY peanut butter jelly time?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dani Donegan (Cradle) on February 02, 2015, 01:41:19 PM
A- Its all part of their evil plan to take over the world and form a new "kittyverse"

Q- Is it REALLY peanut butter jelly time?

A: only if you have a baseball bat
Q: Why does a good percentage of people have Trypophobia?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on February 02, 2015, 02:01:20 PM
a: cause they all want to "try" something new.

q: if we're looking at now, now, what just happened to then?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Xalcon on February 02, 2015, 02:48:53 PM
Quote
q: if we're looking at now, now, what just happened to then?
A: Then became someone else's now.
Q: If the universe is infinite, how big is the biggest star actually?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on February 02, 2015, 05:25:41 PM
Quote
q: if we're looking at now, now, what just happened to then?
A: Then became someone else's now.
Q: If the universe is infinite, how big is the biggest star actually?

A:  I guess it depends how much chocolate they are all eating.

Q:  Why do superheroes wear their underpants on the outside of their clothes?   
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on February 03, 2015, 07:39:26 AM
A: they don't like Skid marks....

Q: if a train leaves Boston at 50 MPH, and a helicopter flies over the Greenswale, what side of a Chicken coup will the roosters egg roll down?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: PinkyHasABrain on February 03, 2015, 11:16:42 AM
A- Thats no rooster. Thats a chicken in drag.

Q- What the heck is a smurfberry, anyway?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dani Donegan (Cradle) on March 06, 2015, 01:13:58 PM
A- Thats no rooster. Thats a chicken in drag.

Q- What the heck is a smurfberry, anyway?

A: The answer to all life's questions other than life's questions. (wah?)
Q: Why does Jesus always steal my Nutella and ride dinosaurs in my apartment?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on March 06, 2015, 01:17:06 PM

A: The answer to all life's questions other than life's questions. (wah?)
Q: Why does Jesus always steal my Nutella and ride dinosaurs in my apartment?

A. You got a bad batch of acid.

Q. Why is incest illegal?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dani Donegan (Cradle) on March 06, 2015, 01:21:57 PM
Quote
A. You got a bad batch of acid.

Q. Why is incest illegal?

A: Why is that even a question?
Q: Why did I just answer your question with a question then ask another question?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on March 06, 2015, 01:24:47 PM
[quote author=Cradle link=topic=2156.msg218951#msg218951 date=1425669717

A: Why is that even a question?
Q: Why did I just answer your question with a question then ask another question?
[/quote]

A. I don't know? Why did you?

Q. Why aren't you in class?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Dani Donegan (Cradle) on March 06, 2015, 01:27:33 PM
Quote
A. I don't know? Why did you?

Q. Why aren't you in class?

A: Because I'm working and it's slow.

Q: Can somebody think of another question for me?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on March 06, 2015, 01:52:50 PM

A: Because I'm working and it's slow.

Q: Can somebody think of another question for me?

A: What, my questions aren't enough? Asshole.

Q: Have you ever heard the bobcat cry to the blue corn moon?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on March 06, 2015, 03:01:06 PM
A. Bicycle.

Q.) Why...  just Why?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Xalcon on March 09, 2015, 08:02:22 AM
Quote
A. Bicycle.

Q.) Why...  just Why?

A: Because according to the molecular theory of hypolithic mictoids, life is nothing but awesomeness and blood.
Q: Why can we make glass out of sand?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: munley on March 09, 2015, 07:44:13 PM

Q: Why can we make glass out of sand?

A.     Same reason Jesus was able to turn water into wine.

B.     Why do cats like to rub their noggins along people's jawbones?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on March 10, 2015, 05:32:48 PM

B.     Why do cats like to rub their noggins along people's jawbones?

A:  Because.

Q:  If hindsight is 20/20, what are the numbers for foresight?

Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on March 10, 2015, 05:46:23 PM
A: 867-5309

q:Who is Jenny Anyways?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on March 10, 2015, 05:59:17 PM
A: 867-5309

q:Who is Jenny Anyways?


A: Jenny is a naughty girl who got her name written on a men's bathroom wall.

Q: Why do good things come to those who wait?  I mean, that's just lazy, waiting.  Why not, good things come to those who work for it?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: munley on March 10, 2015, 08:47:01 PM

Q: Why do good things come to those who wait?  I mean, that's just lazy, waiting.  Why not, good things come to those who work for it?

A. Consider the source. That was said by a worm as the early bird was approaching.

Q.  What do you get when you cross a high school principal with a teabag?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Thoth on March 12, 2015, 05:57:58 PM

Q.  What do you get when you cross a high school principal with a teabag?

A. A surprised school nurse! (Ew, gross. Google 'teabagging', but avoid the images.)
Q: Is curry the spice of life?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on March 12, 2015, 06:15:01 PM
A: no...  but it does make for interesting food.

q: why was Lelaina so in love with Troy?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Thoth on March 12, 2015, 06:48:49 PM
q: why was Lelaina so in love with Troy?

A: It wasn’t ‘love’. According to the latest Fox News report, Troy got the milk for free and had no need of the cow. Lelaina confused love with cliché.

Q: Speaking of clichés, does evil ever win?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on March 12, 2015, 07:21:29 PM
A: ONE MILLION DOLLARS!

Q: To Be, or to find yourself at a crossroads where the choices involve peanut/bee allergies?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Xalcon on March 22, 2015, 08:45:09 PM
Quote
Q: To Be, or to find yourself at a crossroads where the choices involve peanut/bee allergies?

A: Dogs are awesome.
Q: How far is it across the universe 13 times?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on March 22, 2015, 08:48:25 PM

Q: How far is it across the universe 13 times?

A: Thirteen universe-lengths.

Q: Why is the Kool-Aid man so creepy?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kaiodem on March 22, 2015, 09:54:50 PM
A) Because he was raised by the rapey dolphin.

Q) Why do we have tailbones if we don't have tails?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Pandean on March 22, 2015, 10:08:30 PM
Q) Why do we have tailbones if we don't have tails?

A: Our tails disappeared around the same time our common sense did.

Q: Is this real life or is this fantasy?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Kaiodem on March 22, 2015, 10:13:42 PM
Q: Is this real life or is this fantasy?

A: Mushrooms

Q: Will the Trix bunny ever get any Trix?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on March 22, 2015, 10:54:16 PM
A- he actually did once but it became a national security issue.

Q- whatcha gonna do brother?  When the 42 inch pythons run wild on you!
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on December 30, 2016, 06:10:32 PM
Q- whatcha gonna do brother?  When the 42 inch pythons run wild on you!

A: Not respond for almost 2 years, I guess

Q: What in the hell did I just wake up to?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on December 30, 2016, 07:24:52 PM
a: cake and regret.

q: When did it happen?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on December 31, 2016, 02:40:17 AM
a: cake and regret.

q: When did it happen?

A: When I tripped the light fantastic.

Q: Think male ladybugs are ever like, "Gee, why can't we be called manbugs?"
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Tabris on December 31, 2016, 08:17:39 AM
A: You can figure out which are Gentleman Bugs because those are wearing a tophat and cane.

Q: What would happen if everyone blinked at the same time?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on December 31, 2016, 10:21:17 AM
A: The long dark tea time of the soul

Q: Boxers or Breifs?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Noctleigh on January 01, 2017, 10:19:39 AM
Q: Boxers or Breifs?

A: Depends

Q: Who moved my cheese?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Munley on January 01, 2017, 01:41:39 PM

Q: Who moved my cheese?

A.  The Dairy Queen

Q.  Where do tuba players go when they die?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 14, 2017, 11:35:25 PM

A.  The Dairy Queen

Q.  Where do tuba players go when they die?



A:  Purgatory

Q:  Is anyone else creeped out by the fact that an anagram for santa is satan?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Munley on January 14, 2017, 11:50:40 PM


Q:  Is anyone else creeped out by the fact that an anagram for santa is satan?

A. No, but Satan is annoyed because, according to this web page, people "think heaven" when they taste Portuguese natas (Satan spelled backwards)

http://www.ourlittlegems.com/2012/01/portuguese-kitchen-natas/

Q: Why do the French have only one egg for breakfast?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 15, 2017, 12:04:58 AM

A. No, but Satan is annoyed because, according to this web page, people "think heaven" when they taste Portuguese natas (Satan spelled backwards)

http://www.ourlittlegems.com/2012/01/portuguese-kitchen-natas/

Q: Why do the French have only one egg for breakfast?


A:  Because one egg is enough.

Q:  Who left a needle in a haystack?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 15, 2017, 09:17:37 AM
a: no one did.   its a little known law of metaphysics that any haystack becomes a megnetic north for a single needle.

q: Why do my kids have to shout everything rather than talk?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: GLZyx on January 15, 2017, 12:21:39 PM
q: Why do my kids have to shout everything rather than talk?

A: Because (from experience) your ears seem to be deaf to anything below 110 decibels.

Q: What would you do with a quasar?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: 007 fan on January 15, 2017, 11:17:07 PM

A: Because (from experience) your ears seem to be deaf to anything below 110 decibels.

Q: What would you do with a quasar?

A:  I'd put it in my coffee.

Q:  Are zebras white with black stripes or black with white stripes?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 16, 2017, 08:00:16 AM
A: Yes.

Q: What is man's existential Dilemma?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Munley on January 16, 2017, 09:22:25 AM


Q: What is man's existential Dilemma?

A. Should I go to New York or by bus?

Q. What happens when a tea bag falls into ocean?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: Falthor on January 16, 2017, 12:45:29 PM
A: we get one step closer to Tea-pocalypse.

Q: what si the color green?
Title: Re: Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
Post by: GLZyx on January 16, 2017, 12:54:43 PM
Q: what si the color green?

A: No, the audacity of red.

Q: Why bother?