Author Topic: Query for [Title Withheld]  (Read 3276 times)

Offline tradergirl

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Query for [Title Withheld]
« on: March 30, 2008, 07:07:31 PM »
Dear Agent:

I am writing to you today because you have successfully handled several best-selling authors, and because of your reputation for extreme discretion.  I'm aware that your website indicates that you are not currently handling fist time authors.  However, the success of this novel is so assured that-- since you're bound to want to represent me after I become a smash hit-- I believe I can spare you the time and trouble of waiting.

That said, privacy is my utmost concern.  I've enclosed my lawyer's latest version of my non-disclosure agreement.  As it is only six pages, I'm sure it won't take you too long to read it.  If you could kindly sign on the last page, and have the document notorized, (your local bank or neighborhood law office should have a notory public on site) I'd be happy to fill in a little more detail about the book itself.

[Title Withheld] is a thriller.  As Jack Jordan returns from the war, he discovers the shocking truth that in his absence, his wife has been [hook withheld].  To make matters worse, his best buddy Darren has a top secret new job in [location withheld].  When [sh** which hits the fan withheld], nobody will ever be the same.

I eagerly await your positive response-- with the signed non-disclosure agreement I'll be free to send you the manuscript.  In the meantime, I've taken the trouble to write the Library of Congress with my copyright application, just in case the book falls into plagiaristic hands on it's way to you or one of your top competitors. 

Best,

[Author name withheld]
Author of the novel JULIA'S CHILD (Jan 2012 Plume/Penguin) and THE SKI HOUSE COOKBOOK (Clarkson Potter 2007)
Are you interested in book publicity? BlurbIsAVerb.blogspot.com

Offline joanjunkmail

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Re: Query for [Title Withheld]
« Reply #1 on: March 30, 2008, 08:14:34 PM »
funny!
be nice to me or zombies will eat you in my novel
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Offline tradergirl

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Re: Query for [Title Withheld]
« Reply #2 on: March 30, 2008, 08:17:55 PM »
Thanks man.  It is based on a family member... but wildly exaggerated, luckily.
Author of the novel JULIA'S CHILD (Jan 2012 Plume/Penguin) and THE SKI HOUSE COOKBOOK (Clarkson Potter 2007)
Are you interested in book publicity? BlurbIsAVerb.blogspot.com

Offline JeanneT

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Re: Query for [Title Withheld]
« Reply #3 on: March 31, 2008, 11:53:43 AM »
Sad to say I know a few authors who might well write a letter exactly like that. But it's still funny. :D
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