Russian reply to Agent's rejection & 2nd reply in 5th post after MS is revised

[DMcWild]

Dearest number 1 Agent in all US of A and four the peoples of Canada and News Mexico.

Please two telling us rejections you sending is no correct. Me boss who former KGB Major Iville CutYorheadoff saids it rejections is no pleasing him. Why you no liking book with Vampires and romances send by Ivilles pretty niece who live in US of A. Him saids you big sh**s lives in New York city must knows what word Russian Mafia is meaning. Ha thats wright Ivilles have cousins in US of A who having baseball bats used for brooklyn the knee kaps of holes in the behind like you.

Butt if you no changing minds thats okay buy us big sh**s. Bee cause electric mail we all so sended two hour Russian locale US of A office in News Jersey buy nepfew in Russian space station. Sew it getting to US of A fast like pony express. No taking longtimes after four salesmans making selling visits on you. So how you doing now big sh**s. Ha now that we talking US of A talk you understooding. You changing rejections yes. Tell you what cowboy is you knee kaps sew you get two choose wooden baseball bats oar shinny aluminum we bring each. Please bee worrys we sure no forgotting about it.

Sincere

Me Boris another cousin of KGB Major Iville CutYorheadoff

[koevoet]

@DMcWild - this is hilarious, thanks for the laugh today!  Karma!

 

[Nostrabuttus]

That cracked me up. 

[LateToTheParty]

Oh, that's  ~pant~  karma  kookie  for  you.

[DMcWild]

Dearest maybe not so number 1 Agent in all US of A and four the peoples of Canada and News Mexico.

When salesman call you and office no longer open. We chequeing sites on web wide of all world for fineing peepole who no about what poplar book now selling in U S of A.  After we intervewing the cousin of the agent of big time writer of vampires an moving pitchers Stuffinknee Myerror we more uderstooding U S of A market. He screaming to us that vampires and manwolfs no so poplar anymore. Butt that allok, as me boss who former KGB Major Iville CutYorheadoff pretty niece who live in US of A saying big time changes she making in book story and changing name two THE HUNGRY PAINS.

Now knew betters book having vampires from small towns of U S of A near Loose Vegas who playing sluts machine an losers wills bee halfing combat for halfing more rattions of drinking blood of not vampire huemans. Butt stills youse sending more electronic letter said you no wanting books about fuked up peepoles living in U S of A an wantings to drinks blood? Firsts it’s vampires that the pubplising big sh**s no longer wanting. Now its books of peepoles who no longer halfing happy times. Excusings me! You calling yourshelf Agent. Sorry, Agent is somebodies likes me boss former KGB Major Iville CutYorheadoff whose torture and killing peepoles is celerybrated in new USSR. Sorry me thinking you bigger hole in behind then beefour. Youse now sending contracts wit royalty checkers to former KGB Major Iville CutYorheadoff pretty niece who live in US of A or we bee sending out contracters four you.

Sincere but not as same as lass time

Me Boris another cousin of KGB Major Iville CutYorheadoff