Candy Land
P.O. Box 2
New York, NY
Dear Mr.or Mrs. Land:
(I couldn’t tell from the picture on your website what sex you are. So I’ve addressed it like this because I didn’t want to offend you.)
I could tell by the way you decorated your web site that I’d finally found an agent who would “get†my book. (And that’s a BIG compliment because 227 others haven’t been sophisticated enough to understand and that’s just SO FAR!)
I have to go soon (I’m hard boiling eggs and I’m pretty sure they’re almost done) so I’ll get right to it. My book is a ground-breaking new approach. You see, it’s called “Blue†and that’s all it’s about (only that’s not REALLY the color. I’ve changed that for my protection because this approach is so innovative I have to be very careful that no one steals it from me. Not that I think you would. But how can I know who all will see this letter?) Anyway, this is how I wrote the book. I laid on my bed and thought about nothing except blue (only remember that’s not really the color - wink, wink) and then I wrote down the first 27 words that came into my mind. Very stream-of-conscience. Cool, huh? But there’s more! Halfway through I switched it up and thought about a DIFFERENT color! Only I never said that so the reader won’t even know until the very end and isn’t that a cool twist??! I am so excited about this I haven’t been able to think about anything else for the past three weeks! Seriously!
Since the book only has 27 words I’m sure you understand why I can’t share it with you through the mail. Every word is like a pearl in a very lovely pearl necklace and the idea is so innovative. Someone’s bound to steal it before you get a chance to sell it, right? So just to be safe for the BOTH of us, I’ll bring it with me when we meet and show it to you AS SOON AS we sign the contract or whatever we need to do before you can pay me for this book. This is really a busy time of year for me because both kids are in different soccer leagues and the fat one has got tuba lessons like three times a week! But I can come to New York five days from now at 2:30 (I’ve already converted that to New York time; don’t worry - LOL) The closest airport to me is the Quad City one so make this the departure town when you get the plane tickets.
I can’t wait to see you. We are going have SO MUCH FUN with this innovative book!
Yours sincerely,
Lotta Gutts
