Author Topic: Pitch Wars in August!  (Read 177207 times)

CradleOfInsanity

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #495 on: September 03, 2015, 10:01:42 AM »
Yay Tracey!

And congrats to those who got requests! FWIW, I received two fulls and one synopsis, but I was fairly sure I didn't get in, because their tweets seemed to be about other manuscripts. Also, my mentor's co-mentor picked her mentee without requesting anything. She just knew.

Also, my mentor has cracked the whip, and I will be doing some serious homework/rewriting this weekend.

*downs three cups of coffee*

*poofs away in a cloud of smoke*
« Last Edit: September 03, 2015, 10:03:50 AM by Ćrădl€ »

Offline Falthor

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #496 on: September 03, 2015, 10:10:26 AM »
First reply back from a mentor. Lisa maxwell. She loved the premise, the opening, and the query but felt Steve's voice was too mature.

Interesting. I'll have to look into that.
“The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.”

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Offline JohnPansini

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #497 on: September 03, 2015, 10:17:52 AM »
Good feedback from her, Falthor. Maybe you could set this guy up as being more mature than the average teenager.

Speaking only for myself, I read your opening chapter a while ago and I did not get that impression. You might ask others for their opinions.

(f**king Blue Jays refuse to lose!) >:(

Offline quiarahb

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #498 on: September 03, 2015, 01:16:49 PM »
Go Tracy!!! Glad of you to post so we have two QTers to root for!!!

I got feedback from one mentor who said they loved the premise and my stakes were really laid out in the query, but the comp to Alice in Wonderland made her antsy. This was pretty much a preference thing, though I will say that she told me the pace could pick up a bit. This was a nitpick of hers but worth going back through my MS and looking into.

Offline Tracey Enerson

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #499 on: September 03, 2015, 02:03:52 PM »
Okay, so received first edit letter and a phone call from my mentor. The fun begins! First thing he suggests is cutting out the opening 5 pages! Haha, I already cut the original first 10 pages, as it was basically backstory, and thought I was starting in the right place. He's right of course, I need to get into the action sooner, there is too much description in those pages. Now to find ways to slip in the description so readers aren't floating around without a world to anchor them.

gckatz

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #500 on: September 03, 2015, 02:19:22 PM »
Quote
First thing he suggests is cutting out the opening 5 pages!

Starting a book too early is such an unbelievably common problem. It's practically one of those inevitable first-draft things, like including filter words.

CradleOfInsanity

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #501 on: September 03, 2015, 02:56:03 PM »
Okay, so received first edit letter and a phone call from my mentor. The fun begins! First thing he suggests is cutting out the opening 5 pages! Haha, I already cut the original first 10 pages, as it was basically backstory, and thought I was starting in the right place. He's right of course, I need to get into the action sooner, there is too much description in those pages. Now to find ways to slip in the description so readers aren't floating around without a world to anchor them.


Oooh. I haven't' received my edit letter yet, but I've been bouncing emails back and forth from my mentor and I. She wanted me to scrap the end and change a MAJOR character. Not a HUGE plot overhaul, but a complete revamp of the second half, along with other minor edits. I am sure there will be a bunch more, as the edit letter is on its way, along with my first assignment, I think.

I brainstormed an alternate ending and a premise change, and I was afraid she wouldn't like it. But it gave her goose bumps, guys. *wipes sweat off brow* And it is so much better than my original.

I also received my first feedback from a mentor I subbed to. I was really sweet and complimentary, and she basically said she passed because she wasn't entirely she what she could help with.


Offline Tracey Enerson

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #502 on: September 04, 2015, 09:39:35 AM »
Wow, Cradle, awesome progress. Sounds like you and your mentor are a great match. Also some wonderful feedback from the other mentor you subbed to. I haven't gotten notes on the whole novel yet, just the first chapter.
I think this is such an extraordinary experience, I hope to give back by being a mentor some day.

Offline Doggy Teng

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #503 on: September 04, 2015, 02:35:08 PM »
Congratulations Cradle and Tracey! :clap:

And congrats to everyone else who entered, too.  It was fun to read all the drama and excitement in this thread, and I agree that one of the best things about contests is that they can give you the 'kick in the pants' you need to finish and polish up a project by a deadline, and everyone who accomplishes that should be proud of themselves. :up: 

Offline CrawlingChaos

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #504 on: September 05, 2015, 12:32:10 PM »
 Congrats, Tracey!

 I'm looking forward to hearing from everyone going through the process. My twitter feed seems so silent now.

 A couple of the mentors I subbed to said they'd been planning to send me feedback, and one of them already has. She said the writing was strong, but she was confused when the first character introduced wasn't the one in the query. We commiserated a little on the difficulty of writing multi-character query letters/epic fantasy query letters, and she suggested a new query-writing site I might check out. She had also suggested changing the title of the first section from Chapter 1 back to Prologue, as prologues are more acceptable in fantasy. It seems too long for a prologue though, so I'm not sure, haha.

 Anyway--super helpful all around! (:

 Just received an MS from a new CP! Looking forward to reading it, as the premise sounded right up my alley.

Offline eleven02

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #505 on: September 06, 2015, 12:41:19 AM »
I haven't been online much the past week or so (family stuff), but... I had requests for 2 fulls + synopsis, and ended up not getting picked. However, I got some wonderfully thoughtful feedback and a few compliments on voice, so that makes me happy.

Just to counterbalance it, I got one piece of feedback that said they didn't connect to the voice at all. So subjective.

Congratulations, Cradle & Tracey! GOOD LUCK! I'm so happy for both of you.

Offline Falthor

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #506 on: September 10, 2015, 04:50:07 PM »
just got feedback from Erica Chapman...

dialogue tagging and some minor alterations to the opener. I actually went through this but maybe I sent the wrong first chapter to them?   oh well...

good ideas either way.
“The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.”

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Offline Tracey Enerson

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #507 on: October 30, 2015, 04:50:30 PM »
Well, it's almost time for the agent round. I thought my pitch and first 250 words were in pretty good shape. Wrong. My mentor and a fellow mentee helped me make them so much better. It's incredible how others find just the right words, even when, in the case of the mentee, she hasn't read the story. I am honored and humbled being a part of this contest.

CradleOfInsanity

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #508 on: October 30, 2015, 05:30:32 PM »
Well, it's almost time for the agent round. I thought my pitch and first 250 words were in pretty good shape. Wrong. My mentor and a fellow mentee helped me make them so much better. It's incredible how others find just the right words, even when, in the case of the mentee, she hasn't read the story. I am honored and humbled being a part of this contest.

 :yes:

Have you posted your entry yet? I posted mine (as crappy as it is right now!!!).

Also, the lovely people on QT helped shape up my pitch, query, and first few pages (and chapter). Without them I probably wouldn't even be in Pitch Wars. This group is an amazing bunch of people. :)

Offline Tracey Enerson

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Re: Pitch Wars in August!
« Reply #509 on: November 02, 2015, 01:02:59 PM »
Cradle,
Yes, I posted my pitch and first 250 on the Facebook page under events. I also used the Pitch spreadsheet, but the opionions varied. Ultimately, I went with my mentor's top choice.