Honestly, I'm I really that bad....

[Miss Java]

Even if it was a grammar issue, grammar can always be learned and corrected. I would much rather start with a grammar problem than a storytelling problem or a flow problem. Grammar is much easier to learn and correct.

And I'm one of those people that started out with bad grammar; I'd forgotten all of my rules from high school. But each time someone corrected me on my grammar, I used it as an opportunity to grow and learn.

And honestly, the person who told you to quit....shame on them. I'd love to open up his/her early writing and take a gander and critique it. 

[Cedar Mountain]

I saw a few grammar issues but nothing that would detract from the query. It sounds like an interesting book (someday I will break down and read a YA novel) and I wish you the best of luck in landing an agent (or a publisher for that matter).

Writing a good query isn't that easy, as it took me well over three months to write one that I felt accurately reflected what the novel was about. Even test drove it on my blog to see what kind of critique I'd get from my readers.

[lexcade]

YA fiction is FUN. the last several novels i've read have been YA. i reeeeeeeeeeeally wish my teenage experience had been so exciting..........

i'm STILL working on my query 2 years later. i've been trying to sell sell sell but no one's buying with the one i've been using.............. oh well. just gotta keep on keepin' on, right?

[LateToTheParty]

  Grow, evolve, set it aside, (if it'll let you) and come back to it. But never, ever quit.