Dear Agent:
This is the fourth time I've sent you a query on this. You keep skipping over my query in Querytracker, so I know your assistant put it on your desk THREE TIMES. Quit tweeting what you had for lunch with your special agent friends and read my pages. Quit #MSWL-ing about how you are looking for exactly this story and read my pages.
I am normally a quite sane and patient person but there is a limit. I assure you, you will love having me as your client--as long as you don't tend to your other clients first.
Read my pages.
Sincerely...
