Heya all, I recently adjusted my opening and I'd love to get some eyeballs and opinions on it.
First five pages are here: https://querytracker.net/forum/index.php?topic=21871.msg253874#msg253874
Query is here: https://querytracker.net/forum/index.php?topic=21868.0
I leapt and pirouetted across a vast black stage. In the audience, everyone I knew stared in rapt attention. The girls in my ballet class swirled around me, but as the only boy, I was the center or attention. The music swelled to a crescendo and I anticipated the applause—
“Liam’s dancing again!” Hushed whispers and giggles cut through my daydreaming.
My ears burned and I sank down until my head was nearly level with my desk. I must have been moving in time with the music in my head again. Performing in front of everyone I knew was the dream… but it was also my nightmare.
I reached for my book and pretended not to hear my classmates’ whispered jeers.
The thump of a heavy brick of papers landing on Mr. Winklesnatch’s desk drew me back into the classroom. “Here are my homework assignments.” A new girl smiled proudly at her handiwork. I swear the near leg of the desk groaned under the weight.
I closed my book and peered over the top. This could get interesting.
Mr. Winklesnatch adjusted his glasses and stared up from his seat. “It’s the first day of school.”
“I know that….” The girl glanced around in surprise. “What does that have to do with my homework?”
“Uhh….” Mr. Winklesnatch flipped through the first few folders in the stack.
“There’s more!” She chimed brightly.