Author Topic: Couldn't resist revising real estate agent's description of our house -- SOLD!!!  (Read 265 times)

Offline Munley

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We have moved out of the little bungalow we've owned on a city street in the Atlantic Canada since 2012. Most city houses have only around 4,000 square feet of land, but a bigger house than ours.

Our house is about to go on the market. The agent was allowed up to 900 characters to describe our house (in addition to a list of details about room sizes, etc. below).

All the agent wrote was:

"Updates include new roof, new furnace, new oil tank and other improvements. A little updating would turn this bungalow into a sweet little doll house. Would make a good investment property."

Wasn't happy with this description so, being a writer who loves to revise, I sent in this revision to replace it:

This bungalow sits on a 7,800-square-foot lot amid other properties that show pride of ownership on this dead-end street. Most big costs, such as a roof, windows, oil tank, furnace and sewer line replacement, have been recently taken care of. The oil furnace, installed December, 2020, is rated at 96% efficiency. Enjoy sizeable front and side yards, as well as a back yard with two sheds, shade trees, and room for an RV and more. You can modernize the kitchen or keep the cozy cabin feel of a knotty pine floor, plain cabinets and brick chimney. Nearby are a junior high, elementary school, library, rec centre, and terminal with numerous bus routes. Drive to the [popular commuter road]  and M. Bridge in minutes. [SAY SOMETHING ABOUT OFFERS DEADLINE--- HOWEVER THAT SHOULD BE WORDED.]

Agent liked the revision. YAY!

« Last Edit: September 20, 2021, 04:47:34 AM by Munley »

Offline jldelozier

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 :clap:
So much better. You can definitely tell the difference between who was too busy to care and who had some skin in the game (and loved their little house!)
Good luck with the sale.
Jen/J.L. Delozier

Storm Shelter, Type & Cross, Blood Type X, Con Me Once

Offline Munley

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Thanks! The listing went up 2 nights ago. People are looking at it.

How are you?  Still writing, I'm sure.

Offline Munley

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House was sold in a week.

Honestly, though, it's due a lot more to the current market, not my description, but I like to think that what I wrote helped.

Offline MaryL

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Oooo! Congrats on the quick sale!
I write as Marissa Clarke and Mary Lindsey for Penguin/Random House and Entangled Publishing
Repped by Kevan Lyon of Marsal Lyon Literary Agency
http://www.marissaclarke.com

Offline Munley

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Thanks, Mary! Nice to hear from you.

Offline jldelozier

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Thanks! The listing went up 2 nights ago. People are looking at it.

How are you?  Still writing, I'm sure.

Sorry for the delayed response and congrats on the house!
I'm a physician for my day job so the last 1.5 years have been nuts. But I do have a success story that just went down last week. After a year of nothingness, I signed with uber-agent Lucienne Diver and sold my 5th book, The Photo Thief, to CamCat books. It only took me six years to sign with an agent, LOL, but it finally happened. I should probably start a thread in success stories...
Jen/J.L. Delozier

Storm Shelter, Type & Cross, Blood Type X, Con Me Once

Offline Munley

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Wow! Great news! Congratulations!

Let us know when your book comes out.

Yes, good idea to put this news in the success stories section.