. . . There's such a thing as doubting yourself *too* much and it's sometimes better (for pitches, not for books) to mimic successes. It's good to get some overall feedback on whether something at least makes sense or not but there's the risk of getting caught up in so many revisions that you never end up just trying to send something out.
There does come a point when an author who has posted a query for advice just has to decide that the query is good enough to go with.
Those who critique don't know the book as well as the author -- events up ahead, ways various characters move or are affected by those events, how the book ends, the overall feel of the narrative. Even so, you can still get very helpful advice on the query as a business letter whose main purpose is to entice someone to want to read more of that novel. In that sense, readers of the query are in the same shoes as an agent hearing about your book for the first time.
So, at some point, you combine that with whether the query represents your book fairly well, and run with it.
I've seen a few writers get exasperated with a new poster coming on board with new comments about problems with the query, just as the author and other posters have come to a consensus that the query's now good to go. Unless the writer agrees with the new poster, all that's needed is a thanks for that person's time and comments, but you're ready to start submitting the query as is and see how it goes.
Another option is to lock the thread to additional comments if that makes it easier to just start submitting.
I like your comment about positive examples as models, what works, not just what doesn't work.