Author Topic: Pinching myself...  (Read 7876 times)

Offline Abbey

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Re: Pinching myself...
« Reply #15 on: October 17, 2010, 10:38:35 AM »
:eek: Abbey's comment, I half-expect Mr. Chudney to send an email saying "Just kidding!  Ha!" or tell me he's changed his mind, lol., deserves more discussion.

Newday, I would love to hear other thoughts on this, too.  It's really a phenomenon I didn't expect to experience -- a  bizarre, "No.  Really?  You're joking.  You mean it?" type of feeling. 

In fact, here's what happened when I saw his offering email:  I'd expected to hear something much later (he'd only just received my manuscript 2 days before, so I was in for a wait).  So, when I saw his email, my absolute first thought was a dejected, "It's a rejection.  He read the first 50pgs or so, and decided it's 'not for him.'"  I was convinced of it.  I opened the email to find 2 paragraphs.  One was filled with lovely compliments - which I SKIMMED - so I could hurry up the process of rejection, lol.  I knew it was one of those - "I loved this, this, and this - BUT - it just wasn't for me."

When the second paragraph didn't contain a "but," I felt a little catch in my breath and read on.  When I saw "offer of representation" and "contract" I hyperventilated.  Seriously.  I started breathing really fast, couldn't believe it.  Read the email about 6 more times, to be SURE.  Then I called my mother and read her the email, to make sure it was real, lol.  It was absolutely SURreal.  Of course, my job brought me back down to earth quickly (I had to postpone my call with Mr. Chudney until after I got home from work, ugh). 

It's still taken me about 4 full days to believe the contract is real, and not some enormous joke.  Here's my theory:  I spent YEARS balancing hope and reality.  The hope kept me querying, querying, querying, even knowing all the terrible odds.  The reality was that nagging voice in the back of my head that said - "Prepare yourself.  You might NEVER get published."  Plus, of course, years of getting nothing but rejections can really harden you, thicken the skin to where a wall is erected, where you make yourself believe it'll never happen, or even that you're not good enough.  So, when you DO get that acceptance, that contract, you first have to climb over that enormous wall of self-doubt, in order to believe someone likes and wants your work - enough to say "YES"!  Right now, I'm nearing the top of that wall, but still haven't crossed over to the other side.

Sorry to be a windbag here, but one other thing struck me -- the closest I ever came to getting an agent happened a few months ago, when a different agent really liked the book, but said it wasn't ready.  She asked for a rewrite/resubmit, which I gladly did.  Weeks and weeks later, she asked for ANOTHER rewrite/resubmit (we actually spoke on the phone!) but she still wasn't prepared to offer a contract.  Honestly, as honored as I was that she was still interested, I felt quite deflated.  I always pictured getting an agent as something fast and celebratory - but never quite so dragged out and anticlimactic.  I guess that's another reason this contract came as such a shock.  I was used to this being such a long process (one agent took 15 months to respond to a full!), that I just couldn't believe it could all happen in the span of a few days - wham! 
The unexamined life is not worth living. --Socrates

Offline Abbey

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Re: Pinching myself...
« Reply #16 on: October 17, 2010, 10:43:21 AM »
By the way, the other 4 agents who had requested the full, and I've asked to respond by Tuesday??  Two of them were gracious enough to respond immediately (Thursday) and say they'd drop everything and read it over the weekend.  The other two?  Not a single peep.  Not even pushing everything aside for 15 minutes, to read a couple of chapters and SEE if they might want to put their hat into the ring.  Not even an "I'm sorry, but I just don't have time to read your manuscript that quickly" email.  Or even, yes, a rejection of the material.  Just crickets.

I'm truly not being greedy about this - I don't expect any other offers and am totally ecstatic about and satisfied with Mr. Chudney's offer.  But - I did expect a bit of courtesy from agents who had ALREADY requested my full. I just think it's rude, not even replying.  JMO.
The unexamined life is not worth living. --Socrates

Offline lexcade

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Re: Pinching myself...
« Reply #17 on: October 17, 2010, 11:38:18 AM »
Honestly, I'm shocked when my betas tell me they like/love my stuff. I had a beta tell me she couldn't put it down and that it was the best thing she'd read since LOTR. I kept waiting for the punchline.  I can't imagine what'll happen when an agent wants to rep me...hell, I can't imagine what'll happen when an agent requests a partial...
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Offline tradergirl

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Re: Pinching myself...
« Reply #18 on: October 17, 2010, 07:38:54 PM »
YAY!!!!

We have ALL had that feeling, waiting for the punch line, for the joke to be on us.

Just enjoy it!

T.G.
Author of the novel JULIA'S CHILD (Jan 2012 Plume/Penguin) and THE SKI HOUSE COOKBOOK (Clarkson Potter 2007)
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Offline ElanaJ

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Re: Pinching myself...
« Reply #19 on: October 18, 2010, 10:43:45 AM »
Congrats! I have a friend who is with Steven, and she loves him. :p2:
My trilogy is complete! POSSESSION, SURRENDER, ABANDON, and short stories REGRET and RESIST, are available now wherever books are sold.

My next novel, a YA contemporary novel, ELEVATED, is coming on February 18, 2014.

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Offline Zooks

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Re: Pinching myself...
« Reply #20 on: October 18, 2010, 12:34:10 PM »
congratulations, Abbey!  Your happiness and excitement are a breath of fresh air.  karma to you and best of luck.
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Offline Nostrabuttus

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Re: Pinching myself...
« Reply #21 on: October 19, 2010, 01:13:18 PM »
Hooray for you, Abbey. WOW! I am so excited for you.


CONGRATULATIONS!

 :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:
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Offline Abbey

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Re: Pinching myself...
« Reply #22 on: October 19, 2010, 01:43:21 PM »
Congrats! I have a friend who is with Steven, and she loves him. :p2:

Elana, that's so good to hear - thanks for letting me know.  He suggested I contact some of his clients before I signed with him - they just raved about him.  I'm so thrilled - my head is spinning right now.  In fact, he's already talking about specific editors he's contacted, and some minor revisions I could make.  SO EXCITED!

Thanks everyone, for your very kind words!  Your support is wonderful - and I love all the smileys!!   ;D  Y'all are so sweet!
The unexamined life is not worth living. --Socrates

Offline lexcade

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Re: Pinching myself...
« Reply #23 on: October 19, 2010, 02:45:42 PM »
:hug: I'm so glad for you, Abbey! Can't wait to read it!
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Offline bodwen

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Re: Pinching myself...
« Reply #24 on: October 19, 2010, 03:04:20 PM »
Quote
It's still taken me about 4 full days to believe the contract is real, and not some enormous joke.

Congratulations, Abbey!!!     :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: 

It was the same for me.  When I sold my first story and saw the words "Congratulations" in my return envelope I threw everything in the air and starting screaming and jumping around for about a minute.  And this was after I worked a triple shift and my boyfriend has to bring me home because I was too tired to drive. (Poor guy thought I was having some sort of attack.)

When I got the agent offer, I was worried because I was sure I'd misread it.  I had to reread it twice because I was sure it had to be a very subtly worded rejection.  Even when I knew it was real, I was sure it was all going to turn out to be a big misunderstanding...

Offline Abbey

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Re: Pinching myself...
« Reply #25 on: October 19, 2010, 03:28:05 PM »
Quote
It's still taken me about 4 full days to believe the contract is real, and not some enormous joke.

Congratulations, Abbey!!!     :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: 

It was the same for me.  When I sold my first story and saw the words "Congratulations" in my return envelope I threw everything in the air and starting screaming and jumping around for about a minute.  And this was after I worked a triple shift and my boyfriend has to bring me home because I was too tired to drive. (Poor guy thought I was having some sort of attack.)

When I got the agent offer, I was worried because I was sure I'd misread it.  I had to reread it twice because I was sure it had to be a very subtly worded rejection.  Even when I knew it was real, I was sure it was all going to turn out to be a big misunderstanding...

Thanks, Bodwen!  You've had a very similar experience to mine -- not only has it taken me awhile to believe it's all real, but I'm also trying to juggle my "real" job (I'm a full-time teacher) with everything going on right now.  I'm thisclose to pushing a huge set of essays to next week to grade instead, so that I can make the revisions Steven's asking for, starting tonight.  Exhausted, but happy!!!  :-)
The unexamined life is not worth living. --Socrates

Offline ajhoward

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Re: Pinching myself...
« Reply #26 on: October 19, 2010, 07:16:22 PM »
I'M SO HAPPY FOR  YOU. KARMA TO YOU

 :p1: :bear: :bear: :hooray: :hooray: :hooray: :hooray: :bear: :p1:

AnneJ
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