Dear Agent,
Mary Sue Ellen is an exquisitely beautiful sixteen-year-old genius with the voice of an angel who plays ten instruments and speaks seven languages fluently. Puppies, kittens, and baby birds all follow her around and talk to her because they can sense how pure and wonderful she is. She’s nice to everyone, sings in her church choir, works at a soup kitchen every Saturday, and babysits her four young brothers and sisters while her single mother works three jobs after their abusive father went to prison. So why does everyone hate her so much?
Ashley, the leader of the rich girls’ clique at her high school, bullies Mary Sue constantly. She pours rotten milk all over Mary Sue’s gorgeous golden hair, steals her scholarship to art school, and calls her names until everyone in school is afraid to be Mary Sue’s friend. Then Mary Sue's ugly and jealous evil twin Julie Sue joins forces with Ashley, and now everyone thinks Mary Sue is a slut. But that's so not true, because Mary Sue is saving herself for marriage!
But all that is about to change when Ashley’s hunky football-star boyfriend Hunter, who is also a brooding hundred-year-old vampire, starts falling for Mary Sue himself. With the power of true love on her side, Mary Sue develops magical powers that she only uses for Good. Now everyone who was ever mean to Mary Sue or didn’t believe in how awesome and perfect she was is going to learn how wrong and mean they are, and soon everyone will love Mary Sue and apologize for being so mean and stupid to her.
It sounds awesome, right? Everyone I know tells me how much they love it. Can you believe I wrote this whole novel when I was only sixteen years old? I didn't even need to do any editing on it, because my grammar skills are so awesome. It's really the story of my life, if my life went the way I always wished it would. My online screen name is even MarySueEllen because I have so much in common with her. So you can tell this will be an awesome book, because I lived it. I have at least five more books in mind with her name on it, because I've had a LOT of bullies in my life and they all need to learn to stop being mean to people. So when do you want the manuscript? It's all in Old English Text font, because I want you to really feel how mature and fascinating the book is.
Ciao!
