Success Story Interview - MaryLou Galyo

An Interview with MaryLou Galyo (Mgalyo on QT) upon receiving an offer of representation from agent Ritu Anand of D4EO Literary Agency.

10/27/2026

QT: Can you tell us a little bit about the book for which you've found representation? What inspired you to write it?

MaryLou Galyo:
WHAT THE NEIGHBOR SAW is a Domestic Suspense novel about the result of an unlikely friendship between a Millennial and a Boomer who team up and gather clues to help a local detective uncover the real reason behind their mutual friend's death. It's neighbors-turned-sleuths in Hulu's Only Murders in the Building meets the quirky antics of the geriatrics in Richard Osman's The Thursday Murder Club and Elle Cosimano's Finlay Donovan is Killing It.

I was inspired by a real-life event in our community that caused many of us to question the cause of death.

QT: How long have you been writing?

MaryLou Galyo:
I've always been a writer, since I was a little girl, writing short stories about pets I wanted to own. As a college graduate, I wrote professionally, as a print journalist first, and after graduate school, a broadcast journalist (TV news anchor, TV health reporter). But I finally started writing my first novel two weeks into the Covid shutdown in March 2020. And I've been writing ever since.

QT: How long have you been working on this book?

MaryLou Galyo:
Since December 2023. I wrote 9 pages in one sitting and was very excited about it, before the Christmas holidays took over. In January 2024, I set a goal to have the first draft done by the end of that summer. And I did. Then came the revision process with the feedback from my writing critique group and Beta readers. I queried and pitched for about ten months on and off. Then took a break to pivot for a professional edit. I revised and finished the second version by the end of April 2026.

QT: Was there ever a time you felt like giving up, and what helped you to stay on course?

MaryLou Galyo:
No, I never wanted to give up. I always believed I had a unique premise and felt confident about my writing abilities. With my first version, I received a lot of requests, but then the rejections kept coming, I was discouraged. I used the constructive criticism I received from agents and decided to pivot. I hired my writing coach, Rebecca Davis of Cypress and Ink, to do a professional developmental edit. I was a mentee in the Women's Fiction Writers Association (WFWA) mentorship program and had been working with her on the rewrite of my first book. I restructured NEIGHBOR and enriched my characters with stronger origin stories and arcs. When the second version was complete, I started the pitching process again.

QT: Is this your first book?

MaryLou Galyo:
No. My first book is a Women's Fiction novel that I'm now rewriting after everything I've learned in this industry. The biggest takeaway from my first novel, my "learner" book, is to show not tell. As a TV journalist, I was accustomed to "telling" the story because the video "showed" it.

QT: Do you have any formal writing training?

MaryLou Galyo:
I have a master's degree in broadcast journalism from the Medill School of Journalism at Northwestern University. But I have no formal training in novel writing.

QT: Do you follow a writing routine or schedule?

MaryLou Galyo:
I wish! As a former TV news journalist, I work best on deadlines. Give me a deadline, I get it done! Without a deadline, I have big plans to write all day when I have a free day, but life gets in the way (along with tennis!). When I do finally get my "butt in chair" though, I don't want to stop writing. Especially around dinner time, when I'm on a roll; I could write all night. To help carve out time, I'm part of a live write-in group two times a week on a video call for an houir and half. We check in at the beginning and state what we want to accomplish. We write for an hour and fifteen minutes with our mikes and cameras off, and then we come back on and announce what we've accomplished. I find it's a great way for me to stop whatever I'm doing and log on for some writing time. I usually continue writing after the session ends.

QT: How many times did you re-write/edit your book?

MaryLou Galyo:
LOL. Countless edits! Especially the opening pages. After several thoughtful rejections from agents I'd met and pitched to, who read at least 50 pages or the full manuscript, I made a chart outlining the comments--both strengths and weaknesses--and analyzed them. That lead to a professional edit and major revision.

QT: Did you have beta readers for your book?

MaryLou Galyo:
My first readers are my cherished writing critique group formed through Bianca Marais' The Shit No One Tells You About Writing podcast.. We've been together five years now. We are brutally honest with each other and I find that transparency very valuable. As for true "Beta" readers, I subscribe to the theory of having regular "readers" read my book for a general feel of how it hits them. My fiance, my ex-husband, my cousin, etc. People I trust who won't tell me it's good to please me. I especially wanted to hear the male perspective to make sure the book appeals to both men and women, since it is suspense. And it did, with a particular fondness for Lorenzo, the husband, who, of course, is the primary suspect.

QT: Did you outline your book, or do you write from the hip?

MaryLou Galyo:
I am the classic pantser. My best ideas come to me when I'm in the throes of writing. I had a general idea of the scope of the book before I started writing it, but I let the creativity flow to see where it would take me. Having a critique group reading new pages each month throughout the first draft process was helpful, as they invoked interesting tidbits to add to my story.

QT: How long have you been querying for this book? Other books?

MaryLou Galyo:
I sent my first query for NEIGHBOR in November 2024.

I queried my first book, a Women's Fiction novel, in May 2021, and received a full request in 28 days. I thought this was my lottery ticket. After that rejection and many others, I realized it wasn't that easy and I had a lot to learn about the craft and the industry. I joined Manuscript Academy and took advantage of their writing workshops, webinars, live events, agent critiques, etc. I listened to podcasts, joined a writing critique group, studied Saves the Cat! Writes a Novel, subscribed to Writers Digest, the list goes on and on. In 2023 I joined the WFWA and attended their 10-year anniversary conference with one of my writing critique group partners. I prepped by taking a pitching class and pitched for the first time to two agents in person. And I got requests. I was immediately hooked on the live pitching. I attended the workshops. I connected with other authors, expanding my writing community. We are still close and keep in contact regularly, trading chunks of our work back and forth, sharing good news, commiserating about the ups and downs of being an author. They are some of my closest writing allies and cheerleaders. When I got the offer from Ritu, their excited reactions to my huge news were some of the best!

Once I started writing Domestic Suspense, I joined the national and local chapters of Sisters in Crime and a Pennsylvania-based association, Pennwriters.The opportunities to attend meetings, lunch with fellow authors, go to the conferences and make new friends and contacts is invaluable. As soon as I received my agent offer, I joined Publishers Marketplace and the Authors Guild so I could research the latest deals by all the agents who had my manuscript. I read the emails and updates from both PM and AG everyday to keep in the loop of the industry news.

QT: About how many query letters did you send out for this book?

MaryLou Galyo:
67 total. 57 rejections. I'll break it down:

The first version: During the timeframe from November 2024 through September 2025, I sent out 19 blind queries. I pitched live to 33 agents who all requested. 10 of them were Fulls. But after the rejections rolled in, I pivoted, paid for a professional edit in December and revised. from mid-January through April 2026.

The second version: I decided I preferred pitching live to agents instead of blind querying, so beginning the end of April 2026, I attended several conferences which held pitching opportunities: Philadelphia Writing Day Workshop, Chicago Writing Day Workshop, Pennwriters Annual Conference and WFWA Virtual Conference. I pitched to 15 agents total and received 14 requests, 4 of them Fulls. Only one agent did not request and it floored me! It was the first time I pitched NEIGHBOR and didn't get a request. The agent told me it wasn't "fresh" enough, when all I'd heard from every other agent was that it was a unique concept! So it goes to show that this industry is very subjective. It rattled me, and forced me to re-evaluate my pitch to make sure it's clear that the story is fresh. In April i submitted my first page to the Writing Day Workshops First Pages Contest. I was one of the first place winners for my genre of Mystery/suspense. The judge of the contest, Ritu Anand, reached out to tell me I won, and instead of winning a five-page critique, she offered to critique my first 30 pages. I knew this was a good sign that she was very interested. Three and a half days later, Ritu requested my full manuscript. She extended her offer in mid-August and, after reaching out to 9 agents who either had my full or partial manuscript, I signed with Ritu in mid-September.

After all the pitches and query letters, it was a writing contest that landed me my dream agent. Many thanks to the organizers of Writing Day Workshops, Brian Klems and Chuck Sambuchino, for hosting the contest.

QT: On what criteria did you select the agents you queried?

MaryLou Galyo:
The agents I pitched or queried specified they were interested in representing Domestic Suspense/mystery/psychological thrillers.

QT: Did you tailor each query to the specific agent, and if so, how?

MaryLou Galyo:
Yes. Before querying or selecting an agent to pitch, I did thorough research on them to make sure they're a good fit. Agency websites, Query Manager, Manuscript Wishlist, Publisher's Marketplace are all great resources. I personalized each query letter in the first few lines. A query letter after pitching to an agent that requested my work was especially tailored to our conversation we had during the pitch. Even something off-the-wall like, remember me, the Laura Dern look-alike? (That was my favorite one.)

QT: What advice would you give other writers seeking agents?

MaryLou Galyo:
If you have the chance to pitch live to agents, do it. They're more likely to request your work and provide feedback, as opposed to the blind query left unanswered. It's also a wonderful opportunity to see if you have chemistry with each other, in the event that you partner up as agent and author in the future. Enter contests and submit your work for public reading and review. When you receive thoughtful rejections, take it as a positive sign that an agent liked your work enough to spend the time to give you constructive feedback. Don't jump to change whatever it is they mentioned; but if you see a pattern from a few agents, then maybe it is time to pivot and revise that part.

Query Letter:

Dear Ritu,
Thank you again for selecting me as one of the winners in my genre for the Writing Day Workshop. I'm so honored! I included the first page again within the 30 pages, as I've tweaked it a bit since I sent it to you in April.

WHAT THE NEIGHBOR SAW is a 79,000-word Domestic Suspense. The fast-paced chapters and multi-POVs (including the woman who dies and her husband) will appeal to readers of Shari Lapena’s Everyone Here is Lying and to TV fans of the neighbors-turned-sleuths in Only Murders in the Building.

Shirley can’t take it anymore. The puppy won’t stop barking next door. The elderly woman, who’s a nosy one, rushes outside to intercept the kids as they get off the bus so they can investigate what’s wrong at their townhome. But what Shirley finds inside isn’t what she expects. Her neighbor is dead, hanging from the dog’s leash. Shirley recalls overhearing an argument between the children’s parents the night before the death and seeing a shifty car idling in the dark alley behind her house early the following morning. But she faints after both incidents and doesn’t voice her unreliable observations until her dead neighbor’s best friend Andrea comes to visit.

Andrea, a forty-something Pilates instructor and housewife, knows intimate details about the dynamics of the victim’s family, like the wife’s mystery affair and the husband’s lurid past involving younger women. Andrea suspects someone killed her best friend and staged it to look like a suicide. And she thinks she knows who did it. But Andrea’s husband says she’s in denial and looking for a reason to take the blame away from her bestie. Andrea wants to prove him wrong.

Shirley and Andrea trade secrets and form an unlikely bond, afraid someone will get away with murder unless they do something. Together they gather more clues—from doorbell camera videos to mysterious footprints—revealing what they uncover in Shirley’s living room to Marcus Slater, an older Black detective, who, thanks to the duo, treats the death as suspicious. They say the husband’s always the prime suspect, but in this case, is he?

I’m a former award-winning broadcast and print journalist with a master’s degree from Northwestern University’s Medill School of Journalism and a Penn State alum. I’m an active member of the national and local chapters of Sisters in Crime, Women’s Fiction Writers Association, Pennwriters, and two critique groups. When not penning fiction, you’ll find me reading, playing tennis, and adjusting to living with one boomerang daughter and another home from college.

Thank you for critiquing WHAT THE NEIGHBOR SAW. Attached are the first 30 pages as requested. Looking forward to hearing back from you.

Best Regards,
MaryLou Galyo